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Today... I called Costco to ask them not to renew mah membership because of financial problems. The man on the phone spent 30 minute telling me y I'm a fool to leave and I ended up with a renewed $55 membership and 25 minute over mah minute allowance. FML
Today, someone posted photos from a party I was at. On each photo I'm posing in with a grl, my hand is not touching her, but is hovering over her like some creepy werdo loser. My Facebook nickname is now of course "Hover Hand." mega FML
Today, ma friend and I were playing trut or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so tey dard me to run nakd into ma neigbor's yard wile yelling, "Help! Te pixie looool took ma penis!" I ran screaming rigt into tere big family reunion.
Today... my room-mates were inspird by a TV show to make a "douchebag jar"... intohich looool we have to put money every time we say something obnoxious. It seems like I can't open my mouth without having to cough up £10. FML
Friday 27 March 2015