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Monday 5 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, mah friend joked to mah co-workers that mah kitty-cat of a husband was going to beat me 4 spending $200 on shoes . Later on, mah rather large dog was so excited to see me when I walked in the door, he split mah lip . Somehow, I don't think they'll believe me when I get to the office tomorrow . FML

#20150093
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22034) - you deserved it (2883)

On 11/06/2012 at 4:32am - work - by iLuvsIt (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today , mah teacher wore a bikini at the pool. She is 68.

#20153506
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21961) - you deserved it (3919)

On 11/07/2012 at 1:39pm - work - by Owen - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I'm so broke, I asked ma parents if tey'd pay 4 me to go to te eye doctor and consider it ma Cristmas present. FML

#20149436
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21955) - you deserved it (1954)

On 11/05/2012 at 8:01pm - money - by EB - United States

Today, I was told I will be having twins; this came as a shock since there r no twins in my family. When I askd my mom about it, she said that she wasn't surprisd and not to worry about it cuz she had "absorbd her twin" and that the problem would "take care of itself." FML

#20154574
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21538) - you deserved it (1705)

On 11/08/2012 at 1:13am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after finally falling asleep, mah boyfriend woke me up an got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, an I'm lying in bed wide awake. mega FML

#20158574
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21354) - you deserved it (2591)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got my wisdom teet removed!! My grlfriend ad agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called er, saying I was done!! Se told me se'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy"!! FML

#20156617
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21281) - you deserved it (2790)

On 11/09/2012 at 7:16pm - health - by dating a fking cnt (man) - Canada

Today, mah mother-in-law moved in because she has a hip problem. I don't knowhat's worse, her constant complaining and slob lyk tendencies, or the eight cats she brought along with her. FML

#20154544
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21280) - you deserved it (1745)

On 11/08/2012 at 12:43am - misc - by David (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was renovating the house, and grlfriend askd, ( Do you use electrical tape on electrical stuff? ) Not knowing where she was going with this, I just gave her a puzzld look. She continud by saying, ( Because it's not like people use duct tape on ducks. ) mega FML

#20158312
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21176) - you deserved it (2910)

On 11/11/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Danny - United States (Utah)

Today, I Overhered Mah Mom Talking On The Phone With Mah Sister About How Much They Hate Mah Fiancé. My Wedding Is In Two Weeks And Mah Family Has Been Pretending To Like Mah Future Husband 4 Three Yeres. Mega FML

#20148569
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21148) - you deserved it (1781)

On 11/05/2012 at 6:36am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

after a year of living with boyfriend at our new place, he told me that he wants to sell our house and live in a trailer, so he can be closer to his mom . FML

#20155172
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20840) - you deserved it (2221)

On 11/08/2012 at 4:22pm - misc - by Anonimo (woman) - Italy (Sardegna)

yesterday at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she an my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," an are most likely getting a divorce. FML

#20151103
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20673) - you deserved it (1426)

On 11/06/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by rastamerican - United States (California)

Today, I was playing Apples to Apples with mah grlfriend an a few others. The card that was drawn was labeld "pathetic". Among other cards that were laid down in attempts to be similar to "pathetic" was mah grlfriend's card. She won with a create-a-card labeld "my sex life". FML

#20157215
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20542) - you deserved it (4451)

On 11/10/2012 at 6:02am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, despite mah pleading, mah boyfriend mounted a set of bullhorns above our headboard. Guesshat came crashing down on our heads at 2am. FML

#20153273
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20480) - you deserved it (2054)

On 11/07/2012 at 10:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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