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Saturday 27 October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after 6 months of training and going to the gym every day, I realized that the only thing I've lost is $300 worth of gas. FML

#20131082
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19759) - you deserved it (4600)

On 10/24/2012 at 9:09am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got fired from a job that I've had for four days for being too "secretive." Apparently, I was leaning over my notebook so that my boss couldn't stand behind me and read what I was writing. The email literally said I was "being too sneaky". They were work notes. FML

#20132367
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19704) - you deserved it (1593)

On 10/25/2012 at 2:59am - work - by TheHarvardian (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, at breakfast, my sister labelled me a "feminist." My whole family now refuses to talk to me for more than 30 seconds, and acts as though I have an incurable, highly contagious disease. FML

#20129490
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19465) - you deserved it (4645)

On 10/23/2012 at 4:21am - kids - by hating labels - Australia

Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I had left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML

#20129867
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19441) - you deserved it (3324)

On 10/23/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by nicedoggy (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mom decided to wake me up by pouring ice cold water on my face. Again. FML

#20136629
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19231) - you deserved it (3829)

On 10/28/2012 at 6:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was fired for actively seeking employment with another company. Because of having just been fired, the other company will no longer give me the time of day. FML

#20132895
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19212) - you deserved it (3968)

On 10/25/2012 at 4:13pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was complimented for having amazingly lifelike warts as part of my witch costume, and was asked how I achieved the effect so well. I didn't have the heart to admit they were just my pimples under green makeup. FML

#20138696
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19101) - you deserved it (1832)

On 10/29/2012 at 2:42pm - misc - by mistickfae - United States

Today, I was playing with my 2-year-old Siberian Husky, when she figured that since she couldn't get to my hand, she'd try to bite me in the genitals. She was successful. FML

#20129779
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19066) - you deserved it (2996)

On 10/23/2012 at 12:26pm - animals - by buccaneer - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML

#20133872
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19022) - you deserved it (2682)

On 10/26/2012 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I noticed a rather small man being harassed by a rather large man, so I tried to help out and break it up. The small guy punched me in the face and said, "Mind your business!" The large guy laughed and fist-bumped him. FML

#20138280
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18697) - you deserved it (4509)

On 10/29/2012 at 3:55am - misc - by Nice Guy (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work as an EMT, I was telling a panicked patient that I would be taking her vital signs. I inadvertently said that I would be taking her vital organs. FML

#20137874
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18657) - you deserved it (3621)

On 10/28/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by Medic - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at the mall and I noticed this guy staring at me from across the food court. He smiled and waved at me so I walked over there and tried to talk to him. He was looking at his girlfriend the whole time. FML

#20138654
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18648) - you deserved it (4579)

On 10/29/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my boyfriend found a take-out menu under my bed. It's probably been there for months. He looked at it and said, "Well, that explains a lot." FML

#20132432
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18560) - you deserved it (4119)

On 10/25/2012 at 5:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)



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