Saturday 27 October 2012 
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Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17735) - you deserved it (1311)
On 10/26/2012 at 3:58am - health - by Weasel123 - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, while at a psychiatric hospital working as a student nurse, I discovered one of the patients had developed an unhealthy obsession for me. He was admitted for stalking and abusing a girl who looked just like me. It's only my first week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17655) - you deserved it (993)
On 10/22/2012 at 6:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I was working in a call center when I smelled perfume. I'm allergic, and it triggered my asthma. When I came back, some jerk had sprayed it all over my work area. I couldn't go near it for the rest of my shift, therefore I had to go home early, and got my paycheck docked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17543) - you deserved it (1482)
On 11/02/2012 at 12:13am - work - by John - United States
Today, my extremely overweight roommate decided to not only be a nudist, but also to get in shape for his new lifestyle. He's been doing naked lunges in our room for the last twenty minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17518) - you deserved it (1113)
On 11/03/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by xXfloatingshitlogXx (woman) - Norway (Akershus)
Today, I went to a big family dinner. I didn't realize I hadn't been invited until we were about to sit down to eat. There were 12 chairs, 12 plates, 12 forks, and 12 glasses. I was the 13th person to arrive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17514) - you deserved it (1751)
On 10/31/2012 at 10:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after I gave birth to our first child, my husband looked at the doctor and seriously asked, "When do you circumcise the baby?" We had a baby girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17478) - you deserved it (1502)
On 10/29/2012 at 6:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17458) - you deserved it (2166)
On 10/26/2012 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)
Today, I sampled some of the food my fiancée's mom is making for our wedding. Everything tasted terrible, and I almost vomited. Turns out she never actually went to culinary school as she claimed, but had just watched Julie and Julia. It's too late to book another caterer for the wedding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17374) - you deserved it (3479)
On 11/03/2012 at 3:42pm - health - by WeddingWoes (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found a notebook my 12-year-old sister had been doodling in. Turns out the "doodles" were poems full of obscenities and descriptions of how she wanted to hurt herself. When I showed it to my mom, she accused me of writing the notebook myself to frame my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17320) - you deserved it (1179)
On 10/26/2012 at 12:38am - kids - by familyofpsychos - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17227) - you deserved it (2921)
On 10/30/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by Obi1Shinobi - United States
Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (17176) - you deserved it (3554)
On 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I passed out while I was with my boyfriend in his garden. I woke up on the concrete just outside his house. Apparently, he'd tried to carry me in, but because he was too weak, he gave up and went to watch TV. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16987) - you deserved it (2071)
On 10/24/2012 at 12:52pm - love - by Alice - United Kingdom
Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16963) - you deserved it (4118)
On 10/26/2012 at 8:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)
Friday 24 May 2013
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