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December 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I snooped around my parents' room looking for hidden Christmas presents. The only hidden things I found was a whip, two ball gags, several other sex toys, and a load of newspaper clippings about the JFK assassination. What the fuck? FML

#21312961
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20274) - you deserved it (32695)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:10am - misc - by .__. (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, I had my midterm finals for AP Literature. My teacher had good news and bad news for us. The bad news? That he lost the file for our original exam and so had to make a harder exam for us. An exam he told us not to study for. The good news? "Jesus Christ suffered and died for our sins." FML

#21319606
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20076) - you deserved it (1711)

On 12/18/2014 at 7:11am - misc - by Overachieving Loser (woman) - Guam

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

#21318606
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19521) - you deserved it (25775)

On 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm - health - by fuck - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML

#21315734
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19444) - you deserved it (24587)

On 12/11/2014 at 6:13pm - work - by IHateSchool-.- - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He's Latino, so I thought he'd like it if I made a bit of noise and called him "papi" while we did it. It freaked him out enough to kill his boner, and now he thinks I have some kind of incest fetish. FML

#21310722
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18226) - you deserved it (36023)

On 12/03/2014 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, half of my motivation to stop drinking is so that my tolerance will go down, because I currently can't actually afford enough alcohol to get even tipsy anymore. FML

#21319263
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18142) - you deserved it (7438)

On 12/17/2014 at 5:41pm - health - by Recovering Alcoholic - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I discovered that the reason the phone I've had for a year takes such terrible and cloudy pictures is because I never took the plastic coating off the lens. FML

Today, I found a very light blonde long hair on my marital bed's pillow. I confronted my husband about it and after hours of arguments and me throwing his stuff out of the house, I found another. Attached to my head. My husband isn't having an affair, I'm just going grey. FML

#21314908
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16248) - you deserved it (36806)

On 12/10/2014 at 7:59am - love - by mastel07 (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I spent well over an hour waiting for customer service to assist me with my forgotten password, only to realize, 5 minutes into the conversation, that I had never created an account in the first place. FML

#21317146
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15035) - you deserved it (23224)

On 12/14/2014 at 2:19am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I confronted my boyfriend after he received a text with a bunch of hearts on it. After arguing, turns out it was from me. FML

#21316114
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13767) - you deserved it (34503)

On 12/12/2014 at 9:39am - misc - by well, now what - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went out to a bar with some of my friends. They're all in committed relationships, but every single one of them got hit on. I'm single, and yet again, nobody even said hi to me. FML

#21319659
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13570) - you deserved it (1224)

On 12/18/2014 at 10:34am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, my boyfriend jokingly said that if I didn't pass my exam, he wouldn't have sex with me for a month. I failed it, and now he thinks I did it on purpose. FML

#21319715
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13301) - you deserved it (1840)

On 12/18/2014 at 12:59pm - love - by peteto818 (woman) - Bulgaria (Pernik)

Today, I thought it'd be fun to kick open one of those unisex bathrooms in my workplace. I'm not sure who was more surprised, me or my boss who was in there taking a dump. FML

#21315499
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13125) - you deserved it (32943)

On 12/11/2014 at 8:26am - work - by unlucky (woman) - Hong Kong



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