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July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I finally worked up the courage to start a Facebook chat with a guy I really like. It went so well, and he even agreed to hang out sometime. Seconds after we finished our conversation, he changed his status to: "Desperate bitches really piss me off." FML

#20803390
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61051) - you deserved it (7291)

On 07/25/2013 at 7:20pm - love - by sucksatlove (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at the store, when I saw my boyfriend in line in front of me. I looked to see what he was purchasing; it was a pack of condoms. When I questioned him, he said that, "They're for us, babe!" We already have an unopened pack at home, and it's my time of the month. FML

#20799401
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60548) - you deserved it (5771)

On 07/23/2013 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by MenstruallyFrustrated - United States (Arizona)

Today, my driving instructor failed me on my test, because I forgot to turn the air conditioning off after parking. FML

#20780305
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60528) - you deserved it (5413)

On 07/13/2013 at 4:40pm - misc - by WOW (man) - Kenya

Today, the great deal on my new apartment has turned into a nightmare. I keep hearing extremely weird sounds almost every night, and when I tried taking pics of the place today, my camera's face recognition feature kept activating, but only in my bedroom. I'm scared shitless. FML

#20796032
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60477) - you deserved it (4397)

On 07/21/2013 at 4:54pm - misc - by notenoughunderwearintheworld (man) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

#20808604
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60458) - you deserved it (8977)

On 07/28/2013 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my sister announced her pregnancy at my husband's funeral. FML

#20782670
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60026) - you deserved it (3003)

On 07/14/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by thatsfine (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I came home at 1am to find my mom sitting on my couch, ranting about how I'm not supposed to stay up this late. I'm 26 and I don't know how she got into my house. FML

#20775513
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60021) - you deserved it (3742)

On 07/11/2013 at 2:26am - misc - by whowhat (man) - United States

Today, as I was enjoying a nice fish salad, my father looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Ahh, salmon. The 'other' pink meat", then winked suggestively at my mother. I don't think I can ever eat fish again. FML

#20763590
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59931) - you deserved it (4751)

On 07/04/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by ugh (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend's boss. She was wondering if he was okay, since he hasn't shown up to work for the past two weeks. Now I'm wondering where he's been going when he leaves the house each day. FML

#20799589
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59875) - you deserved it (3981)

On 07/23/2013 at 3:03pm - love - by Hesintrouble (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend's dream came true; he had always wanted to break a bed during sex. The bed he broke was a heirloom in my family for 150 years. The best part: he was by himself. FML

#20804404
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59753) - you deserved it (5132)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:09am - intimacy - by amiezingme - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

#20785133
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59726) - you deserved it (21056)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the grocery store with my husband, only to find that his ex-wife worked there. Then I found out he never actually divorced her. FML

#20786957
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59558) - you deserved it (4666)

On 07/16/2013 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by me:( - United States (Michigan)

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

#20775868
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59337) - you deserved it (6965)

On 07/11/2013 at 11:18am - work - by vet1 (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)



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