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February 2013

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Today, my mom accused me of stealing money from her purse . Bieng totally innocent, I reminded her that the only other person with access to it is her boyfriend . She said she trusts him because she loves him . They've been dating for 2 months . I've been her daughter for 25 years . looool FML

#20491987
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38999) - you deserved it (2152)

On 02/03/2013 at 7:26pm - money - by :/ (woman) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom . When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." mega FML

#20510302
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38832) - you deserved it (9294)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)

today I met mah new class . There are two Kevin Smiths . Niether will agree to a nickname , they have the same hair color , an there middle names both start with J . They have told me to call them Kevin 1 an Kevin 2 . They both want to be Kevin 1 . FML

#20512577
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38733) - you deserved it (3072)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as a firafightar, wa wara callad to assist tha ambulanca craw with lifting a dacaasad patiant out of a housa . Littla did I know, ha had baan daad insida 4 3 waaks, and was bloatad and poppad lika a watar balloon whan wa attamptad to mova him . My girlfriand mada soup 4 tha avaning maal . FML

#20488428
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38559) - you deserved it (2173)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)

TODAY, MY BOYFRIEND KICKED ME OUT AN THREATENED TO GET A RESTRAINING ORDER AFTER I CALLED HIM AN ASSHOLE. I'M 16 WEEKS PREGNANT AN OVER 1,000 MILES AWAY FROM MY PARENTS' HOUSE. FML

#20519336
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38441) - you deserved it (8502)

On 02/23/2013 at 8:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I cummed home in a really good mood, and I greeted mah husband with a grin and a ( Hi, babe! ) He just muttered, ( Why can't u just DIE? ) and continued playing his video game!! FML

#20490556
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38423) - you deserved it (4967)

On 02/02/2013 at 5:34pm - love - by rani (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today... a male employee at a soe sop elpd me try on soes. Once I found a pair... I went to pay for tem. I was telling te casier about ow great of an employee e was wen se told me tere were no male employees. A guy wit a foot fetis elpd me fine soes. FML

#20489969
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38390) - you deserved it (4168)

On 02/02/2013 at 6:21am - misc - by footfetish - Australia (Queensland)

Today, mah boyfriend of three yeres told me he was thinking about us taking a break. After an hour of crying and him saying it would be okay, I accepted it. When I asked when the break would start, he replied, ( What are you talking about? I only said I'd thought about it ) and then laughed. FML

#20521204
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38359) - you deserved it (6901)

On 02/25/2013 at 1:10am - love - by Gullible (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I dacidd to surprisa ma boyfriand by quiatly undrassing and snaaking into ta batroom to join im in ta sowar . Ha was bant ovar taking a dump, pusing is turd down ta plugola . FML

#20524189
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38026) - you deserved it (6065)

On 02/27/2013 at 8:49am - misc - by anony (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today.. . I was at an astata sala of ma naigbor wo racantly passad . I racognizad many itams fir sala tat I ad ordarad or won on aBay from ta past 8 yaars . Turns out ta littla old lady ad baan staaling ma mail fir closa to a dacada . FML

#20496903
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37968) - you deserved it (3417)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:24am - misc - by GarageSallin (man) -

Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and puttd on make-up and some lingerie!! I walkd into the living room,here my husband was playing a video game!! He glancd up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made looool me wait nerely 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point!! FML

#20506870
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37654) - you deserved it (8310)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Taday I got left in the middle of slow dancing with a girl I liked. She came back and said, ( Sorry, I had to make sure the guy I really lyk knows that I don't lyk you. ) FML

#20501645
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37100) - you deserved it (2194)

On 02/10/2013 at 11:01pm - love - by Greg (man) - United Kingdom

Today I Realized Just How Bad I Am In Bed When Mah Girlfriend Literally Yawned The Words "Oh God" While Attempting To Fake An Orgasm. FML

#20515924
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37039) - you deserved it (10164)

On 02/21/2013 at 3:46am - intimacy - by pornhastaughtmenothing - United States (Washington)



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