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December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend read online that oversleeping has been linked to strokes later in life. He's now taken it upon himself to protect me by making sure that I have as minimal sleep as possible. FML

#20429358
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33357) - you deserved it (3106)

On 12/29/2012 at 2:33am - love - by nosleep (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my best friend announced she was getting married. I've always wanted to be a bridesmaid but she then added, "You can't be in the bridal party because you don't have the same body type as the other bridesmaids. But you can still come to the bachelorette party!" FML

#20194701
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33315) - you deserved it (2761)

On 12/07/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by SBCR (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my workplace was having a raffle and was giving away a Venus shaving kit. A co-worker won, but instead of keeping it, she walked over and handed the basket to me in front of everyone, said "You need it more" and walked away. FML

#20433619
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33310) - you deserved it (6320)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:17am - work - by shaving kit (woman) -

Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML

#20187578
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33251) - you deserved it (2515)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:03am - love - by Anna - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML

#20199068
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33224) - you deserved it (12295)

On 12/10/2012 at 1:37pm - intimacy - by hnickell93 - United States (California)

Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML

#20200101
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33189) - you deserved it (3595)

On 12/11/2012 at 3:39am - love - by you're just creepy. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, one of the girls who has made it her job to ruin my life cornered me in the hallway at school. She tried to insult me, and for the first time in my life I had a scathing comeback. My elation quickly ended when she violently shoved my face into the water fountain. FML

Today, my neighbor installed a large radio that loudly plays Christmas music 24/7. When I called in a complaint to the police department they told me to, "get in the Christmas spirit." FML

#20404496
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33072) - you deserved it (10927)

On 12/17/2012 at 9:28pm - misc - by James (man) - United States

Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML

#20409224
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32711) - you deserved it (6408)

On 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML

#20406767
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32707) - you deserved it (3944)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:16am - health - by Igor (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32669) - you deserved it (7986)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, I overheard my parents fighting about who has been the most loyal. I found out my Dad has cheated twice, and is still the most faithful of the two. FML

#20198811
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32560) - you deserved it (1891)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:41am - love - by slenderman908 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to slowly explain to my mother that Americans are not the only people who celebrate Christmas. FML

#20419656
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32549) - you deserved it (2783)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)



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