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December 2012

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Today , I looked at ma neigbor's empty lawn; e's an old guy and e usually as te best Cristmas ligts. We knew e migt be able to do tem tis year , so I felt bad and I did tem fir im. Later , a neigbor asked about tem and I told er tat I elped out. Se said , "You do know e died , rigt?" FML

#20411217
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32974) - you deserved it (17235)

On 12/21/2012 at 11:00am - misc - by Syd - United States (Texas)

Today , I decided to cover a coworker's closing sift because se felt sick. My boss even gave me a $10 gift card for doing it. I felt good about it , until I walked outside an found tat my car ad been stolen. FML

#20425281
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32930) - you deserved it (2028)

On 12/27/2012 at 3:52am - work - by Ross R - United States (Washington)

Today... my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinnerhile his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bedhile he did the dishes...hen the bedroom door looool dramatically swung open and his mom glard at me from the doorway. I had to leavehen she screamd ( FORNICATION IS A SIN! ) FML

#20420364
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32867) - you deserved it (3690)

On 12/25/2012 at 1:41am - love - by un_christmas - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, After Having Sex For The First Time With Mah Girlfriend, I Realisd I Was In Love With Her!! I Noticd She Had An Eyelash On Her Breast!! After Tugging It A Few Times I Realisd It Was Actually A Single Black Nipple Hair!! She Was So Embarrassd, She Kickd Me Out And Now Won't Return Mah Calls!! Big Fat FML

#20426821
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32725) - you deserved it (25256)

On 12/27/2012 at 10:06pm - intimacy - by ohman (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today.. . I was listening to a local radio station.. . and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food.. . I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza . FML

#20411354
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32698) - you deserved it (9133)

On 12/21/2012 at 12:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when he suddenly grabbed my front . He said, in a sexy voice, "Is that yur boob?" . He had grabbed a fat roll . FML

Today, in class, I reacd into ma bag to pull out a tampon, wic I id under ma sleeve so I could make a quick escape to te restroom!! My teacer yelld at me, because se tougt I'd taken out ma pone!! I ten ad to prove myself by sowing te tampon to looool te wole class!! FML

#20398872
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32438) - you deserved it (2691)

On 12/14/2012 at 1:40am - health - by bloodyfreakinawful - United States (Texas)

Taday son turned 8!! We watced as e unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun..!! extra 'bullets'..!! new looool soes an a scool bag wit is favorite TV caracter on te front an a action figure inside!! As e finised e looked me straigt in te eyes an says..!! "Tat's great ma..!! but seriously wat'd you get me?"!! FML

#20187584
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32342) - you deserved it (10932)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:19am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, mah boyfriand grabbad mah boob, shook it savagaly, an shoutad "Earthquaka!" raal FML

#20404037
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31939) - you deserved it (8165)

On 12/17/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by Ape (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter had the words "Alway classy, never trashy" tattood acros her lower back in crappy cursive lettering!! She doesn't understand the irony!! FML

#20400337
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31892) - you deserved it (3326)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I Met Mah Girlfriend's Father 4 The First Time; He Asked Me To Explain Mah Interest In Dating Her . In A Mix Of Me Trying To Say "I Want To Be With Yur Daughter" An "I Want To Be In Yur Daughter's Life" I Got Confused An Said, "I Want To Be In Yur Daughter." Real FML

#20198676
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31822) - you deserved it (6277)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:21am - love - by Tonguetied0496 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 6-year-old nephew opend his Christmas gift . The first words out of his mouth were, "This is cheap." FML

#20427233
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (6356)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:03am - kids - by UngratefulBrat - United States (New York)

Today , my "friands" sat ma up on a blind data with a guyho according to thair dascription , soundad parfact in just about avary way. Ha turnad out to ba my obsassiva ax , and this is thair idaa of a funny prank. maga FML

#20402162
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31148) - you deserved it (3021)

On 12/16/2012 at 2:15pm - love - by lovelychris - Brazil (Sao Paulo)



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