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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML

#20175626
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27208) - you deserved it (3078)

On 11/23/2012 at 7:38pm - love - by jakeson12 - United Kingdom (Dundee City)

Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML

#20166401
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27132) - you deserved it (5557)

On 11/17/2012 at 8:34am - love - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)

Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML

#20180075
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27100) - you deserved it (2526)

On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was giving my son a driving lesson. He blatantly ran a red light, so I told him to pull over to let me drive us home. As I walked over to the driver-side door, he instead locked me out and drove off by himself. FML

#20156278
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27081) - you deserved it (6598)

On 11/09/2012 at 1:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Argentina (Buenos Aires)

Today, I found out my girlfriend of 3 years has been cheating on me. When I explained the situation to the "other guy", he exclaimed that I was lying because I was jealous and trying to ruin his relationship. He punched me in the face. FML

#20177730
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27020) - you deserved it (2538)

On 11/25/2012 at 3:09am - love - by king400 - United States (California)

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

#20157750
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26867) - you deserved it (1940)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, my wife wants to name our first child Siri, after the iPhone function. FML

#20182157
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26825) - you deserved it (2557)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by boo8713 (man) - United States (California)

Today my boyfriend and my best friend had a very lengthy, detailed conversation about Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit, of which I know nothing about. Once they stopped, I looked at him and smiled, and he responded with, "Why can't you be more like her?" FML

#20183421
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26780) - you deserved it (7974)

On 11/28/2012 at 11:33pm - love - by JStein (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my best friend got engaged to the guy she's been seeing for five years. He also happens to be the man I've been in love with for eight. As she was giving me the details, she nonchalantly gave me her reason for accepting the proposal: "Why the hell not, there's always divorce." FML

#20149647
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26773) - you deserved it (4021)

On 11/05/2012 at 9:48pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML

#20158993
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26772) - you deserved it (3022)

On 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm - money - by youfuckingslut (man) - United States

Today, I found a wounded turkey in our backyard. I brought it inside, put it in a cage, and tended to its wounds. I then left. When I got back home, I smelled the wonderful aroma of my mother's cooking. She had prepared a turkey, the one I'd rescued. FML

#20162095
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26709) - you deserved it (5086)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:17pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, on my way to school, I was shouted at by an obnoxious businessman for sitting down on the train when a "full fare paying passenger" was standing. I would normally have given him the seat straight away, except I have a broken leg. I showed him my leg and crutches. He still made me get up. FML

#20159990
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26709) - you deserved it (3085)

On 11/12/2012 at 1:50am - health - by myleghurts (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was told that my insurance will no longer cover my birth control as it's deemed "unnecessary" for a man, which, according to them, I've been since August. I'm definitely still a woman. FML



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