Today, this really big woman asked me for some cigarettes. I didn't have any, which made her angry. Angry enough to pick me up, stuff me in a dumpster, and sit on the lid. I still smell like garbage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19361) - you deserved it (1313)
On 11/28/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was visiting family in Oregon. I did not know it was illegal to pump your own gas; the cops were involved. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19326) - you deserved it (1386)
On 11/12/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19296) - you deserved it (2345)
On 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm - money - by youfuckingslut (man) - United States
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend while we were on my couch having a romantic moment. She seemed incredibly excited when she saw the ring and put it on. The way she bolted out the door tells me I'm not going to see her again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19214) - you deserved it (1271)
On 11/15/2012 at 1:35am - love - by minime94 (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I received my first ever hand-job. It would have been great if she didn't wipe it across my face when I had finished and storm out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19099) - you deserved it (3858)
On 11/14/2012 at 4:06am - intimacy - by fuzz94 (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19095) - you deserved it (1749)
On 11/13/2012 at 7:02am - love - by Med (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)
Today, I came home to my mother-in-law wearing the gold chain which I usually keep in a hidden drawer. I searched my drawer only to find out my chain was missing. I asked my mother-in-law if she took it and she keeps denying the fact that she stole it from me. My husband is on her side. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19028) - you deserved it (940)
On 11/29/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by elizabeth - United States (Nevada)
Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19024) - you deserved it (1269)
On 11/21/2012 at 4:54am - misc - by WamBamSam - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)
Today, my best friend got engaged to the guy she's been seeing for five years. He also happens to be the man I've been in love with for eight. As she was giving me the details, she nonchalantly gave me her reason for accepting the proposal: "Why the hell not, there's always divorce." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18904) - you deserved it (2707)
On 11/05/2012 at 9:48pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I called off my engagement, after finding out my fiancé is cheating on me. I recently started a new job, and in anticipation of getting married, I asked that my username include his surname. They can't be changed, so now I get to log in every day under that sorry bastard's surname. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18888) - you deserved it (6065)
On 11/20/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by notAMrs (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I've now worked on Thanksgiving, Black Friday, the weekend after that, and two days this week. My husband and son have had all that time off, and yet I've still ended up having to clean the dishes and the house after them on all of these days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18844) - you deserved it (3661)
On 11/27/2012 at 1:05pm - work - by bored - United States
Today, my long distance boyfriend broke up with me. Tomorrow he should be expecting the super long love letter that I poured my heart into and sent him a week ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18815) - you deserved it (1343)
On 11/24/2012 at 2:02am - love - by whatever (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18762) - you deserved it (3763)
On 11/17/2012 at 8:34am - love - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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