Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19289) - you deserved it (1938)
On 10/26/2012 at 1:58pm - intimacy - by fiftyshardsofbroccoli (woman) - United States
Today, my husband and I decided to tell our sixteen-year-old daughter that she's adopted. Her response was, "Thank God!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19277) - you deserved it (4395)
On 10/19/2012 at 3:59am - kids - by best_mom_ever (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, while walking down the hall of my old school, I noticed something out of the corner of my eye. Behind the faculty parking lot where I parked my truck, two students were having sex on my tailgate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19245) - you deserved it (1642)
On 10/03/2012 at 1:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went to the bar I've always gone to after work for the past 12 years. On arrival, I got banned for life, punched in the nose and thrown out. The barmaid comes out and says, "Sorry, wrong guy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19241) - you deserved it (961)
On 10/24/2012 at 6:51am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I witnessed my mother-in-law reach into my wife's purse and practically empty it out into her pocket. When I confronted her and called my wife into the room, both of them accused me of lying through my teeth, because I've always hated her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19218) - you deserved it (1258)
On 10/14/2012 at 4:57pm - money - by hate enough to kill... (man) - Netherlands (Limburg)
Today, the power went out at school. If it's out for more than twenty minutes, standard procedure is to let us go home. They came back on almost nineteen minutes later. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19186) - you deserved it (2787)
On 10/15/2012 at 3:00pm - work - by anon - United States (Virginia)
Today, I woke up to a gift from my boyfriend: a Playboy magazine with a Post-It note that said, "Just a reminder that you're easily replaceable." I think he's still mad at me for beating him on X-box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19117) - you deserved it (2090)
On 10/28/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by becca (woman) - United States
Today, I learned that despite having told them two years ago, my parents still aren't accepting of me being gay. I found this out when my mom called and asked if I was "cured" yet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19063) - you deserved it (3418)
On 10/24/2012 at 6:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I received another letter of rejection from the university of my dreams. I got it the first time, but thanks for reminding me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19022) - you deserved it (1250)
On 10/17/2012 at 2:52pm - misc - by ThreeTimesUnlucky - South Africa (Gauteng)
Today, my boss fired me because of the way I laugh. Apparently it reminds him too much of his ex-wife's laugh. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18952) - you deserved it (1489)
On 10/09/2012 at 9:57am - work - by Johnnogood (man) - United States (New York)
Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18937) - you deserved it (4581)
On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States
Today, my roommate set her extremely loud alarm clock for 5am and continued to hit the snooze button every ten minutes until 7:30. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18935) - you deserved it (1118)
On 10/10/2012 at 1:38pm - misc - by tiredofthis - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I tried to tell my best friend how wrong she is to be dating a married man, whose wife happens to be pregnant with their first child. Our talk ended with her calling me a "meddling, frigid bitch" and me being told this is why I can't get laid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18927) - you deserved it (1630)
On 10/20/2012 at 2:50pm - misc - by Dillyduzit (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Monday 17 June 2013
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