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September 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet rock seriously. FML

#20058507
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24784) - you deserved it (4827)

On 09/05/2012 at 4:14am - love - by steve (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cotton swab shoved up my cock's piss-pipe. FML

#20057281
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24775) - you deserved it (8443)

On 09/04/2012 at 11:09am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I told my husband that I'm tired of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML

#20062989
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24754) - you deserved it (5003)

On 09/08/2012 at 10:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after completely refilling my almost empty gas tank, I witnessed the price flip from $3.69 per gallon to $3.59. FML

#20082194
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24733) - you deserved it (2185)

On 09/21/2012 at 2:49pm - money - by The Drew - United States

Today, my fully grown, 90-pound German Shepherd sniffed and wagged his tail as a guy mugged me. FML

#20054806
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24589) - you deserved it (2144)

On 09/02/2012 at 10:07pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at work, when an elderly lady casually mentioned it was her birthday. I motioned two of my coworkers over, and we sang a little happy birthday to her over the phone. Our boss stormed in mid-song and suspended all three of us on the spot for "unprofessional behavior." FML

#20082592
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24577) - you deserved it (2431)

On 09/21/2012 at 8:28pm - work - by karmas a kunt (man) - United States

Today, my mother texted me that she was in labor. She never told me she was pregnant. Apparently she's engaged too. FML

#20091458
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24563) - you deserved it (1958)

On 09/27/2012 at 8:41pm - misc - by annoyed - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to look for the horrid stench coming from my bathroom. It turns out my roommate has been throwing away her used tampons in the "trashcan by the sink." That "trashcan" is my old antique vase. FML

#20077513
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24550) - you deserved it (2387)

On 09/18/2012 at 7:56am - misc - by raesos91 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was really impressed with the man I've been in a relationship with for over 2 years. He had finally really cleaned his apartment. Everything was washed and fixed, even my stuff was cleared from open surfaces. All so his lover would not find out about me. FML

#20094642
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24541) - you deserved it (2126)

On 09/30/2012 at 2:29am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, my intoxicated husband asked my very conservative parents how their sex life is now that all the kids are out of the house. FML

#20088791
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24497) - you deserved it (2826)

On 09/25/2012 at 9:48pm - intimacy - by kiwi2323 (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that I spend more money on gas to go to my job than what I get paid. FML

#20086643
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24490) - you deserved it (3188)

On 09/24/2012 at 2:21pm - work - by izziegrl - Mexico (Mexico)

Today, a dog attacked me. Its owner, instead of apologizing and helping me, said it was my own fault for making it think I was an attacker by running past them. We were on a jogging track. FML

#20052963
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24418) - you deserved it (1546)

On 09/01/2012 at 7:15pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was waiting for my wife in a mall when some kids came and sat near me, wearing band t-shirts. I recognized some, as I was into The Smiths and Black Flag in my youth. I tried to strike up a music-fan chat with them. "Fuck off, grandad" and "Ew, pedo" is all I got in return. FML

#20087854
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24324) - you deserved it (4304)

On 09/25/2012 at 7:54am - kids - by HenryRollinsForPresident (man) - United States (Oklahoma)



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