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Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6776) - you deserved it (99332)
On 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm - misc - by Major3 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I spent 300 dollars making colored flyers for my iPhone that I lost. On the flyer I wrote for whoever found it to call me and I would give a reward. I wrote the phone number of my iPhone that I lost. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14617) - you deserved it (98224)
On 02/28/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by Mike (man) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, after taping 5-year-olds do a skit at an improv camp, I used the camera's view-finder to zoom in on a female co-worker's chest. Another female co-worker tapped me on the shoulder to show that the TV was still connected to the camera. Parents, kids, and instructors all witnessed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9897) - you deserved it (97813)
On 03/13/2009 at 9:06pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I was holding a lit cigarette in one hand and a lollipop in the other. Guess which one I licked? FML
I agree, your life sucks (16004) - you deserved it (97441)
On 05/03/2009 at 5:05pm - misc - by htothecr (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I was taking an exam and I knew I was unprepared, so I wrote some cheat notes on my ankle. As I cross my legs to look at my notes, I realize I wore tall boots to class. I can't even cheat properly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10633) - you deserved it (96795)
On 04/16/2009 at 12:21pm - misc - by Joe (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27230) - you deserved it (96449)
On 03/26/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by douchetard (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I sat next to an attractive punk/rock guy on a plane. I decided to try to impress by playing music I thought he would like. I clicked The Who and opened a large window with the album cover, so he could see. The track then shuffled, and he was face to with a giant image of Miley Cyrus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11154) - you deserved it (96361)
On 03/15/2009 at 12:22am - love - by UH-OH (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I just woke up next to the most unpopular girl in school. Damn Vodka. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12737) - you deserved it (96137)
On 11/06/2008 at 4:43am - intimacy - by Ben-Ben - Sent from mobile version
Today, I went to a movie with my boyfriend. In the lobby, I asked why the glasses were not working. I said, "Do they only work inside the theater?" My boyfriend replied, "3-D glasses just work inside the movie, everything else in the World is pretty much 3-D." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6955) - you deserved it (95819)
On 02/12/2009 at 1:00am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7671) - you deserved it (95224)
On 08/13/2009 at 3:47pm - health - by Nick (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38898) - you deserved it (94999)
On 06/07/2009 at 2:02am - love - by dawg3360 - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was pulled over for speeding. When the police officer approached me and asked for license and registration, I accidentally gave him my fake I.D. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12556) - you deserved it (94854)
On 05/06/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by FakeID (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (209823) - you deserved it (94850)
On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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