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Today, my house was broken into. They didn't take much, but they did paint spunking cocks on the walls and furniture. FML

#20858925
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34706) - you deserved it (2263)

On 08/29/2013 at 5:38am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my Dad decided to take his medicine before eating. He passed out with his face in a plate of chocolate cake. He wasn't responsive so I called the paramedics. When he got to the hospital, the doctor asked him if he knew why he was there. He replied, "Because my stupid daughter over reacted." FML

#6298520
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26239) - you deserved it (2262)

On 11/14/2009 at 7:35am - misc - by Kassiopia (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my father went out to get batteries for the remote control helicopter I bought him for Christmas. In his excitement, he backed his truck into my car. FML

#6947126
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18839) - you deserved it (2262)

On 12/25/2009 at 10:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my grandmother's excuse for not going to my college graduation was because she'd already bought her bingo card. FML

#16514185
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27399) - you deserved it (2262)

On 06/05/2011 at 2:15pm - misc - by xXEndlesslullabyXx - United States (New York)

Today, the woman I'm training at work asked, while staring intently at the keyboard, "now, which one of these buttons is the space-bar again?" She is 80 years old, types about 1 word per minute, and I have just one week to get her completely trained. FML

#17376704
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24981) - you deserved it (2262)

On 08/05/2011 at 10:42am - work - by jhftrainer23 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

#17508595
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32686) - you deserved it (2262)

On 08/18/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, I was pulled over for going the wrong way on a closed highway. The construction signs pointed me in that direction, and the cop agreed that they should be fixed. Did it stop him from giving me a ticket anyway? Nope. FML

#18096005
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30027) - you deserved it (2262)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:59am - misc - by ashleyyyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, while at the mall, a lady dropped her credit card while in line to buy something. I came over, picked it up and gave it to her just for her to shove it in my hand and scream, "She's stealing my wallet! My wallet!" The police came. FML

#20536740
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32927) - you deserved it (2262)

On 03/09/2013 at 7:04am - money - by whaaaaat111 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had a seizure in class. Being an epileptic, I had warned my professor of the possibility that I could have one in class. She was understanding and seemed very concerned about my issue at the time. After I had the seizure, however, she asked me if I had ever tried exorcism. FML

#20963219
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41610) - you deserved it (2262)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:00am - health - by seizuregirl17 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at a Christmas party when I noticed someone had taken all of the cash I had from out of my wallet. It was a family gathering. I'm related to the culprit but have no idea who it is. FML

#20994219
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35407) - you deserved it (2262)

On 12/15/2013 at 11:47pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was forced to spend New Years Eve with my strict/conservative parents in the middle of nowhere in Illinois. If I had nothing else, I looked forward to watching the ball drop in NYC. As the seconds counted down the T.V. shut off. Parental controls shut down cable at midnight. FML

#7073820
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30444) - you deserved it (2261)

On 01/01/2010 at 2:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after some filing mistakes, and a lot of waiting on hold, I'm finally registered for Spring classes. I was ready to enjoy this term, until I found out that my ex, who was forced into therapy after he threatened to kill me, is in half of my classes. FML

#14622823
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25895) - you deserved it (2261)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, a man tried to rob the winery I worked at by knife-point. I managed to scare him off by throwing a bottle of wine at him. My boss fired me because I broke a $25 bottle of wine. FML

#18423886
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35779) - you deserved it (2261)

On 12/04/2011 at 12:19am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



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