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Today, after going to college 4 5 years to become an architect I discover my plumber makes more than I do . FML

#761
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20551) - you deserved it (3057)

On 12/30/2008 at 6:16am - work - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I pulled up next to a lady who was trying to text, smoke, and drive. My brother said that she was probably going to cause an accident. He was right. At the next light she hit us. She then yelled that I purposely caused the accident because, "that's how teenagers are". FML

#21129304
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47060) - you deserved it (3057)

On 05/03/2014 at 1:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, despite all of the empty seats on the bus, a man sat next to me. So close to me that our legs touched. After a few moments of silence, he got closer and whispered in ear, ( You're so quiet. ) big fat FML

looool 2day a customer cummed in to the Pizza store where I work and complained that the food they had purchased had a strand of black hair in it. After some deliberation, my boss decided to fire me. He is the only staff member there with black hair. I shaved my hair 2 weeks ago. mega FML

#965793
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79015) - you deserved it (3056)

On 04/14/2009 at 7:18am - work - by hcfan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today , I Made A New Friend: The Cricket The Doctor Pulled Out Of My Ear Canal. FML

#20479072
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31828) - you deserved it (3056)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:53am - animals - by Ear Invasion - United States (New Mexico)

Today, it's 17th birthday, and the first birthday since mother did, leaving me to live with previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick". One more year. FML

#20581667
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63885) - you deserved it (3056)

On 04/09/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

while working as a lifeguard , a kid took a dump in the pool . When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it , another kid promptly stared at me , stood at the shallow end righthere I was standing , pulled down his trunks , and peed on my feet . FML

#20696326
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46134) - you deserved it (3056)

On 05/30/2013 at 10:35pm - work - by heyyoitsapotato - United States

Today, mah boss found out that mah grlfriand dumpad ma. Ha askad if that maant sha would no longar bring har dalicious homamada cookias to tha offica. Whan I said yas, ha frad ma on tha spot. FML

#20990683
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48063) - you deserved it (3056)

On 12/12/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by justin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I trid baking own bread to save food money!! Unfortunately I screwd it up, prompting wife to look at me pityingly an say "Wow, can't get even bread to rise." before walking out!! I have erectile dysfunction, an she constantly insults me lyk this!! big fat FML

#21333974
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38969) - you deserved it (3056)

On 01/09/2015 at 3:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was aving a nice moment wit ma granddaugter as se was being affectionate by stroking ma face. We were bot quite content, until se said, ( Aw, Grandma, your skin feels just lyk a crocodile. ) FML

#5977481
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30274) - you deserved it (3055)

On 10/24/2009 at 5:14pm - kids - by Granny (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today , ma boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to ma grandmoter telling us tat ma cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convincd. FML

#14583588
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21752) - you deserved it (3055)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:24pm - animals - by inchetogb - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

#21249886
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34168) - you deserved it (3055)

On 09/01/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by s0728 - United States (Texas)

Yesterday, a middle-aged customer tried to pay for a $2 ice cream bar with a credit card. It was declined, so he made me swipe it again. Declined. "Quit touching the metal strip," he scowled. I held the outer edge of it and swiped. Declined. He then bitched me out as his mother paid for him. FML



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