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Today, my demented little sister walked up to me and kicked me between the legs. I told my parents, but they just accusingly asked me what I did to provoke her. When I said "nothing", they accused me of lying. There is no justice. FML

#21247278
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37463) - you deserved it (2886)

On 08/28/2014 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, I woke up with this terrible toothache and called my mother for a lift to the dentist. This super-dentist-chick enters in and says: "Nice to meet you, your mother just told me you're afraid of dentists?" I'm 29. FML

#2012
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17814) - you deserved it (2885)

On 01/21/2009 at 7:36am - love - by Noname - Canada (Quebec)

Today, was a nice day, so I opened the sunroof and all the windows in my car. My hair started flying around and at one point it went out the sunroof. My friends thought it would be funny to close my hair in the sunroof. They laughed until they couldn't open it up again. It short-circuited. FML

#5043249
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38936) - you deserved it (2885)

On 09/04/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by badhairday (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend took me on a romantic weekend away at a hotel. What is he doing now? On his computer looking up stuff on Craigslist while I am watching t.v. alone. FML

#8230215
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20262) - you deserved it (2885)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:03am - love - by lonelygirl (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I discovered my parents have spent my college fund because "2012 will happen" before I graduate. FML

#14561634
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42873) - you deserved it (2885)

On 01/13/2011 at 12:48am - money - by skyhigh - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my son teabagging his sister over a video game. FML

#20156633
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22204) - you deserved it (2885)

On 11/09/2012 at 7:30pm - kids - by john r.t. (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was woken up from a nap by my cat attacking my face. Evidently, my husband thought it would be funny to shine a laser pointer on my cheek. FML

#5608454
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31646) - you deserved it (2885)

On 10/02/2009 at 6:23pm - love - by Zamaria - Sent from mobile version

Today, a 75 year old lady drove into me. Her excuse was, "I wasn't looking." Awesome. FML

#11412835
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34512) - you deserved it (2884)

On 06/23/2010 at 9:51pm - misc - by hurricane0331 - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out how painful it is when your ceiling fan falls on you. FML

#17337129
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33407) - you deserved it (2884)

On 08/01/2011 at 10:46pm - misc - by Username - United States (Missouri)

Today, the creepy girl in my history class told me that she once spent a whole period doing nothing but counting the freckles on the right side of my face, and that I have more than she's ever seen before on anyone else combined. FML

#17712418
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28672) - you deserved it (2884)

On 09/10/2011 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, it was my birthday, and my kids gave me my car keys I had "lost" a week ago. FML

#17547713
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28413) - you deserved it (2884)

On 08/22/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by rene - United States (Texas)

Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML

#19173617
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20807) - you deserved it (2884)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend told me it wasn't working out and he was breaking up with me. The reason? I have the same first and last name as a very unpopular girl, and he gets embarrassed when people mistakenly assume he's going out with her. FML

#13379120
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31157) - you deserved it (2883)

On 10/09/2010 at 2:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

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