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Today, I gathered the courage to ask my crush on a date. As I called her, she quickly answered and said "Can't talk right now, I'm in a movie theater." and then hung up. I'd called her home phone. FML

#4706873
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37002) - you deserved it (2759)

On 08/21/2009 at 11:36am - love - by sophistication (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. Apparently, the mafia is out to get him. FML

#19071061
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23051) - you deserved it (2759)

On 02/14/2012 at 1:32am - love - by Just_Me_88 (woman) - United States

Today, I was woken up by my teenage son pulling down my shirt and taking pictures of my breasts. FML

#20124963
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33233) - you deserved it (2759)

On 10/20/2012 at 4:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, it's my first day at a new school. I transferred here halfway through the year to get away from a girl who bullies me. She's apparently bullied her mom into transferring her here as well. FML

#20513405
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40333) - you deserved it (2759)

On 02/19/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by SchoolSucks (woman) - United States

Today, my dad lost his mind over the meteorite incident in Russia. He's convinced that it's part of some big government conspiracy to cover up a UFO crash-landing, and now he won't stop dismissively calling us "sheep" and telling us "do the research" just because we don't agree with him. FML

#20508499
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23501) - you deserved it (2759)

On 02/15/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by dadsadipshit - United States

Today, at work, I dropped a heavy block of lead on my hand. On my hunt for ice, I had to tell my manager - who told her manager, who told the chief - in the end, the whole department found out and they made me fill in two long arsed incident reports. I had to fill them in myself with my busted up hand. FML

#7192176
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19503) - you deserved it (2758)

On 01/07/2010 at 12:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was late to dinner with my anal-retentive parents because my boyfriend was too busy making cock puppets in the shower to get ready to go. FML

#8339859
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13433) - you deserved it (2758)

On 02/16/2010 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by tacolove69 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was showing me photos on his iPod when he came across a photo of a half-naked girl. He tried to play it off by quickly changing it, only to reveal even more half-naked girls. FML

#20065430
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24603) - you deserved it (2758)

On 09/09/2012 at 10:12pm - love - by hatemyluck (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had my first job as a wedding planner. I'd spent a year making sure everything was right. After the wedding my friend comforted me by saying, "You had to have known it wasn't going to be perfect." I knew that it wouldn't be perfect, but I had expected the groom to at least show up. FML

#20676942
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41839) - you deserved it (2758)

On 05/21/2013 at 12:10am - work - by future walmart employee (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I fell down in the street when a speeding car chucked a hard-boiled egg at my butt. While I waited for the feeling in my legs to return, they came back and threw more. FML

#20958238
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37010) - you deserved it (2758)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:00am - misc - by Eggs (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, a woman cursed me out, called me a perverted freak, and said I should be ashamed of myself because I had asked her "How much for one night?." She works in a toy shop, I was with my five year old daughter, and was pointing to the sign, "Rent A Helium Tank!" FML

#6354900
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39509) - you deserved it (2757)

On 11/18/2009 at 2:52pm - kids - by whatthewhat - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized that the only part of my body that has had a reduction in size from changing my diet and working out isn't my stomach or my thighs but my already undersized breasts. FML

#7094608
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26724) - you deserved it (2757)

On 01/02/2010 at 12:15am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got my lip pierced. By the orthodontist. FML

#13518841
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35409) - you deserved it (2757)

On 10/19/2010 at 11:05pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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