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Today, I got on the subway with a broken leg. A kind woman stood up and offered me her seat. Before I could sit down, a guy shoved past me and took it for himself. The woman and I pointed out my cast and crutches, and asked him to give up the seat. He responded by flipping us off. FML

#20685391
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52265) - you deserved it (2832)

On 05/25/2013 at 12:14pm - misc - by a hex upon your anus, sir (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, as I was sitting in my car in a mall parking lot an old couple got into their new van and backed right into me. The man got out and in broken english decided it was no big deal. He turned to leave and tried to pat my back, but smacked my ass instead. I was hit by a car, and spanked for it. FML

#1274514
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44132) - you deserved it (2831)

On 04/23/2009 at 10:12pm - misc - by pleasebackintomycaragain (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I attended a focus group. Since I've been unemployed for a month now I thought the $60 would come in handy. By the time I finished someone had broken into my car, stole my GPS and MP3 player. FML

#6236488
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23288) - you deserved it (2831)

On 11/09/2009 at 10:16pm - money - by unlucky (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was lying in bed minding my own business when my mom entered the room. I was proposed to a few weeks ago by my boyfriend, and my mom came in to tell me that my boyfriend's mom was on the phone. Turns out, he stole the engagement ring from her drawer. FML

#6517359
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33928) - you deserved it (2831)

On 11/29/2009 at 5:52pm - love - by violet (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

#7304423
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32634) - you deserved it (2831)

On 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by notasgood (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML

#21077397
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34668) - you deserved it (2831)

On 03/03/2014 at 11:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realized I need a new job when I had to take anti-anxiety medication before meeting with my boss. Last time we met, I had a panic attack. FML

#18570101
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21880) - you deserved it (2830)

On 12/21/2011 at 1:10pm - work - by bosslady12 - United States

Today, my kitchen nearly burned down because the fire alarm didn't detect the plumes of smoke wafting through the kitchen. This is the same alarm that wails when I use the toaster. FML

#18825531
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28060) - you deserved it (2830)

On 01/16/2012 at 3:18pm - misc - by Lea (woman) - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, I was told that I look like a cross between Roger Federer and Neil Patrick Harris. Apparently I have a big forehead and a squished face. FML

#13762185
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17799) - you deserved it (2829)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:32am - misc - by facingit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I met my girlfriend's family. Her mother wants us to stay in separate bedrooms, and I was happy to oblige since I'm staying at their house. But because there isn't an extra room, we have to stay together. Upon entering the house, her mom searched our bags for condoms and birth-control pills. FML

#18341424
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30836) - you deserved it (2829)

On 11/24/2011 at 9:09pm - intimacy - by vistingherfamily (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boss fired me for dating a co-worker. There's no policy forbidding it; he just thought it was unfair that I could get with the "hottest girl who works here" but he can't. I live in an at-will employment state. FML

#16960895
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28022) - you deserved it (2829)

On 07/03/2011 at 12:21pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my 5 year old daughter watched me getting dressed in the bathroom and asked "mum, when my boobs grow, will they droop like yours?". FML

#983
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24678) - you deserved it (2828)

On 01/12/2009 at 4:37am - kids - by Lax - Sent from mobile version

Today, I walked into my new maths class. I stepped inside only to be yelled at by the teacher for nearly 15 minutes. I was then told never to enter her class again and was sent to the principal. My identical twin brother was in her class the period before me. He also has a thing for older women. FML

#4329810
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58600) - you deserved it (2828)

On 08/06/2009 at 6:10am - misc - by slamo (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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