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Today, my friend told me I'm not welcome in her house anymore. I've spent the last two months painting and doing it up for her, because she's pregnant and couldn't herself. I just finished the job. FML

#11640890
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33742) - you deserved it (2789)

On 07/03/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by Sapphirlinda (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I had such a violent coughing fit that my stomach emptied itself all over the floor while at my sales job. FML

#15500531
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26814) - you deserved it (2789)

On 03/26/2011 at 4:54pm - work - by burntloyalty - United States

Today, I was just about to sit down to watch my favorite TV show when my dog jumped over the back of my couch, landed on my head and tried to jump through the window. I now have concussion and a window to replace, all because of a bird. FML

#18038155
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24230) - you deserved it (2789)

On 10/21/2011 at 11:35am - animals - by Mr.P - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my friend told me she was going to start drinking gatorade, so she could get the body shape of the athletes on TV. When I tried to explain to her that she'd also need to work out to achieve this, she went nuts and hurled the bottle at my face. FML

#19818788
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24916) - you deserved it (2789)

On 06/20/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by phonnah - United States (Maryland)

Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML

#20147554
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23505) - you deserved it (2789)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by i fking love docb - Virgin Islands, U.S.

Today, I had to pull cheese out of my PS3's disc tray because my younger brother assumed all PS3's could grill stuff because "Youtube told him." FML

#7315075
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29288) - you deserved it (2788)

On 01/13/2010 at 3:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I noticed that my wife changed her status on Facebook to "widow" and a lot of strange guys commented saying stuff like "Finally." Last I checked, I'm not dead. FML

#13352571
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41126) - you deserved it (2788)

On 10/07/2010 at 6:10am - love - by Alex - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I met a new guy at work who would not stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me he was her husband. FML

Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML

#17588509
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30369) - you deserved it (2788)

On 08/26/2011 at 7:32pm - misc - by Alexis - United States (Virginia)

Today, I carpooled with my co-worker whose girlfriend has left him. The radio was playing the song "Jar of Hearts." He then began to sing intensely, and broke down crying. FML

#18244080
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26625) - you deserved it (2788)

On 11/14/2011 at 3:45am - work - by Anon - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was house-sitting for some friends of my grandparents while they are out of town. While I was in the shower, the dog decided to take my dirty underwear and run. There is now a pair of lacy, black underwear hidden somewhere this giant house, and they return tomorrow. FML

#19421032
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21658) - you deserved it (2788)

On 04/07/2012 at 12:32am - animals - by day001313 (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I texted a cute picture of my boyfriend and me to my mom, who lives very far away. She replied saying that my Photoshop skills are great, but that I don't need to go so far to pretend that anyone would date me, and that there's no shame in being single at 25. FML

#20899972
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43679) - you deserved it (2788)

On 09/29/2013 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had my first day off in weeks. I was excited about getting to sleep in, until my boss called me at 6:30 in the morning to remind me I didn't have to come into work. Thanks. FML

#5482829
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34979) - you deserved it (2787)

On 09/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by NoSleep (man) - United States (Texas)



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