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Today, I just got back from a two week vacation. I live with six people and only the dog was happy to see me. FML

#21252441
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32354) - you deserved it (2983)

On 09/05/2014 at 2:54pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, was my uncle's funeral. He was cremated, and his wish was to have his ashes spread into the sea. As we were waiting for the waves to come and take him away, a group of seagulls came by picking at all his ashes. I guess he tasted good. FML

#12782393
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29227) - you deserved it (2982)

On 08/28/2010 at 2:07am - misc - by SeagullsShouldDie - United States

Today, it's my birthday, and my present is that my mom is coming over to see me so that she can borrow three hundred dollars. FML

#16062957
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32333) - you deserved it (2982)

On 05/05/2011 at 11:41pm - money - by MrFerret -

Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML

#20665269
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40436) - you deserved it (2982)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my parents used my going away party as a cover up for my sister's surprise party. I didn't know until they brought out the cake. FML

#21022962
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39319) - you deserved it (2982)

On 01/09/2014 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, I was stuck in the elevator for almost two hours. Where was the elevator mechanic? Next to me in the elevator. FML

#21098357
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42538) - you deserved it (2982)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:42am - work - by ClaustrophobicNightmares - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I discovered that my fiancé had tried to fake his own death because he thought it would be easier than confessing to the affair he was having. FML

#2820060
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64878) - you deserved it (2981)

On 06/12/2009 at 12:41am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that chivalry truly is dead when a seemingly fit man pushed me into a door to get a seat on the train before me. My leg is in a cast. FML

#16101857
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34317) - you deserved it (2981)

On 05/09/2011 at 3:38am - misc - by Username -

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML

#20847854
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42569) - you deserved it (2981)

On 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm - work - by twatstick (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

#20994621
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53084) - you deserved it (2981)

On 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by confsused - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I lost my virginity to my long time boyfriend and found out I'm severely allergic to latex. I also found out that my family doctor had been transferred to the ER. He went to play golf with my dad later. FML

#7257583
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18464) - you deserved it (2980)

On 01/10/2010 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by Foxy (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I decided to tell my husband our marriage was over after I found out that he'd not only been stealing from me, but he'd also been downloading child porn. He then asked if we could break up but live in the same house so I could help pay his bills. FML

#7353297
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40343) - you deserved it (2980)

On 01/15/2010 at 2:51am - love - by cuppincake (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my fiancé suggested we bring his elderly mother with us on our honeymoon. FML

#14422998
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33098) - you deserved it (2980)

On 01/01/2011 at 8:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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