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Today, I met my wife's other husband. FML

#6436745
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39331) - you deserved it (3071)

On 11/24/2009 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by bmonehh (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my mom screams like a dying monkey while having sex. Even with my music turned up all the way, I can still hear her through our paper thin walls. FML

#14867901
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35415) - you deserved it (3071)

On 02/06/2011 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband went nuts. He's quit his job and set out building an amateur bomb shelter in our backyard. According to him, there's "substantial evidence" that cannibalism is on the rise across the country, and that "it's gonna be like Resident Evil out there, babe." FML

#19738484
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27453) - you deserved it (3071)

On 06/05/2012 at 1:21pm - love - by why... (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, in the middle of my online midterm, my computer decided to update and closed out of the test. It can't be retaken. FML

#19927975
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34148) - you deserved it (3071)

On 07/12/2012 at 12:08pm - misc - by failure - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML

#4391923
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50313) - you deserved it (3070)

On 08/08/2009 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, at work, my boss made me spend a hour trying to catch a baby raccoon in the parking lot. I'm a bank teller. FML

#13525218
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25897) - you deserved it (3070)

On 10/20/2010 at 2:08pm - work - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was extremely constipated. This is a side effect of the medication I take to alleviate my stomach condition. Due to this same condition I can't eat much roughage. We have no laxatives or stool softeners, and I have been shitting bricks for three days. FML

#14124824
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20889) - you deserved it (3070)

On 12/07/2010 at 9:38pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I celebrated my birthday with a few friends at home. As I bent down over my cake, my friend pushed my face into it. The baker should have told me she put in a stick to support the cake. FML

#15914816
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36084) - you deserved it (3070)

On 04/25/2011 at 1:01am - misc - by Mr. Headshot -

Today, I found out that my mother is extremely emotional when it comes to animal deaths when a bird flew into the window and died, and she insisted we have a funeral. FML

#19441830
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18654) - you deserved it (3070)

On 04/10/2012 at 7:13am - animals - by tay (man) - Australia

Today, my sister was "sexting" her boyfriend over Apple messages. Since we share an iTunes account the messages appeared on my iPod. Apparently, he shouldn't be silly, and should wrap his willy. FML

#19841077
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28166) - you deserved it (3070)

On 06/24/2012 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Addison - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was rejected for an internship due to 'lack of experience.' I have both an MA and a BA from a highly prestigious school and years of work experience. My would-be superior: a 24 year old without a graduate degree and only one year of work experience. She wore jeans to the interview. FML

#7137648
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27615) - you deserved it (3069)

On 01/04/2010 at 12:29am - work - by screwed (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to file for bankruptcy because my ex-wife didn't want to pay for the house she didn't want me to have in the divorce, and didn't bother to have my name removed from the loan before she filed bankruptcy herself. FML

#8604257
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23250) - you deserved it (3069)

On 02/23/2010 at 11:22pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, one of my boyfriend's friends ranted on about how I am such a crappy girlfriend and how all of his friends don't like me. I just spent over $200 on a surprise party that I invited them all to last weekend. FML

#14597219
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24844) - you deserved it (3069)

On 01/16/2011 at 1:50am - misc - by me - United States (Georgia)



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