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Today, after sex, my boyfriend turned to me and said, "You know, sometimes, you look like Kevin Spacey." FML

#18832495
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27178) - you deserved it (3472)

On 01/17/2012 at 3:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Libyan Arab Jamahiriya

Today, after math class, the resident creepy kid approached me and asked me out. I've only spoken to him twice before, so I was creeped out, and I politely declined. He totally lost it, and shouted that I'm a "friend-zoning bitch" before storming out of the room. FML

#20072034
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24943) - you deserved it (3472)

On 09/14/2012 at 8:03pm - love - by wow kid just leave me alone (woman) - United States

Today, my house was egged while I went out shopping. When I told my dad about it, he immediately and casually admitted to being the one who did it, asking, "You got a fucking problem with that, son?" I don't know if he's just messing with my head, or if he really did do it. FML

#20756478
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42341) - you deserved it (3472)

On 06/30/2013 at 6:08pm - misc - by thefuck (man) - Ireland (Cavan)

Today, I burned my hand while making breakfast. As I staggered around the kitchen in agony, looking for some burn cream, my cat figured he'd latch onto said hand and drag his claws through the burn. FML

Today, when I was finished eating at McDonalds, I went to Shoppers to pick up a new toothbrush. I got back to my car only to find the windows smashed in. The only thing that was missing from my car was the Hello Kitty toy I got from McDonalds. Someone broke into my car for a 10 cent toy. FML

#5087862
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47323) - you deserved it (3471)

On 09/06/2009 at 7:12pm - money - by effmylife (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after recently having had surgery, I Iearnt that some extra tissue was needed to cover up the hole in the roof of my mouth. Where did they get this tissue? From a dead person. I now have the flesh of a dead person in my mouth, which by the way is now infected. FML

#8361510
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40856) - you deserved it (3471)

On 02/17/2010 at 12:07am - health - by Sophie - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered a bat in my new apartment. I found him in my shoe... with my foot. FML

#12583063
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35112) - you deserved it (3471)

On 08/17/2010 at 1:09pm - misc - by Bruce (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found the carcass of the frog that got into my house last week. It was a horrifying sight, but not nearly as horrifying as the fact that I found it in my refrigerator. No, I don't know how it got in there either. FML

#20828988
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42546) - you deserved it (3471)

On 08/09/2013 at 12:15pm - animals - by W...T...F (woman) - United States

Today, I tried baking my own bread to save food money. Unfortunately I screwed it up, prompting my wife to look at me pityingly and say "Wow, can't get even bread to rise." before walking out. I have erectile dysfunction, and she constantly insults me like this. FML

#21333974
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42350) - you deserved it (3471)

On 01/09/2015 at 3:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

#21362166
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39493) - you deserved it (3471)

On 02/23/2015 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sammy18f (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML

#18586179
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33704) - you deserved it (3470)

On 12/23/2011 at 2:42am - intimacy - by balkangirl94 - United States (Florida)

Today, while at the store with my mom, we ran into the girl I recently confessed to being interested in. My mom decided to shout, "IS THAT HER?! IS THAT THE GIRL YOU LIKE?!" Embarrassed, I desperately told her to be quiet. She grounded me for being "rude" to her. FML

#20508609
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36501) - you deserved it (3470)

On 02/15/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, after telling my mother-in-law about my recent miscarriage, she cheerfully made a cake to celebrate. FML

#20714826
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51634) - you deserved it (3470)

On 06/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anoymous - United States (California)



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