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Today, my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, and making me walk the 4 miles home in the freezing rain. FML

#18145406
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39586) - you deserved it (2939)

On 11/03/2011 at 5:18am - misc - by Grounded (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend gave me a gift. A half-used bottle of body lotion that belonged to his dead wife. FML

#17741306
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31397) - you deserved it (2939)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:12am - love - by ppp - United States

Today, in the senior class I teach, I asked my students who had traveled outside of the country, excluding Canada and Mexico. One student raised his hand and proudly stated, "Arizona". He wants to be a doctor. FML

#17980491
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28272) - you deserved it (2939)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at a party. Everyone was drunk, and I happened to overhear someone say, "Where's that guy in the black jacket? I'm going to beat his ass!" I wouldn't have thought anything of it, had I not been the only one wearing a black jacket. FML

#20433319
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24349) - you deserved it (2939)

On 12/31/2012 at 1:46am - misc - by bpruitt95 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, at my grandparent's funeral, we were waiting for the pastor. He was fashionably late because he couldn't find his sunglasses and had gone to buy new ones. FML

#21194487
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39199) - you deserved it (2939)

On 06/30/2014 at 11:59pm - misc - by too cool (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was reading through a local wedding mag's advice page. A mother-in-law to be was writing about how to handle wanting her son to break off his engagement. I thought, "Wow. That must suck. I'm glad I like my mother-in-law to be." And then I saw her name. FML

#2593216
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67405) - you deserved it (2938)

On 06/04/2009 at 7:11am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I offered an elderly man my seat on the train. He thanked me by winking and offering me a seat on his lap. FML

#19387576
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21386) - you deserved it (2938)

On 04/01/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I called my boyfriend to see if he wanted to come over to my house. He said he couldn't because he was out of town. That would have be perfectly acceptable, if I hadn't called him on his house phone. FML

#18032391
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34646) - you deserved it (2938)

On 10/20/2011 at 5:18pm - love - by cmd102 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mother-in-law thought it would be appropriate to give my five-year-old daughter some bedclothes with the Playboy logo all over them. FML

#19152626
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24838) - you deserved it (2938)

On 02/24/2012 at 8:26am - kids - by Joanne (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my sister is nursing an injured cat back to health in our home because she accidentally hit it with her car. Now I can't decide which is contributing more to my insomnia: the incessant meowing, or the constant itching because our house is infested with fleas. FML

#12889600
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21103) - you deserved it (2937)

On 09/03/2010 at 7:02pm - health - by insomniac (man) -

Today, my mom and I went to Best Buy for some Christmas shopping. She picked up some presents for me and told me not to look at what she was buying. When we got to the register, she didn't have enough money, and I ended up having to buy my own presents. FML

#20413996
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34974) - you deserved it (2937)

On 12/22/2012 at 3:25pm - money - by dude, where's my balls? :( (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my roommate and I noticed a foul smell in our apartment. After looking around for a little while, I found that her cat had pooped on a pair of my jeans, and apparently tried to cover it up by dragging a shirt over the mess. FML

#20479640
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23939) - you deserved it (2937)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:18pm - animals - by peteswentzbass - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, my date sent me a text saying "I'm sorry we're running late, we will be there shortly." I replied asking what she meant by "we". She said her parents, who were coming along to chaperone. I laughed about two 27 year olds having chaperones, until she walked in with her parents. FML

#6258074
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34274) - you deserved it (2936)

On 11/11/2009 at 1:53pm - love - by Tragics (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)



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