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Today, a drunken guest in the hotel I work at has barricaded himself in the employee restroom and refuses to come out, unless I "promise to love him forever." It's 4am and I'm the only one here. FML

Today, my husband decided to play a recording of me breaking wind in my sleep to my whole family at the dinner table. To make matters worse, it was a compilation of different noises from over a long period of time. My family was horrified and my husband seemed proud of himself. FML

#21222673
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29548) - you deserved it (2972)

On 07/28/2014 at 12:36am - misc - by blow away - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I accepted a great job offer I've been working months to earn so I can continue to live with my fiancé here in Poland. I just found out that my work visa was denied. Now I have to fly home to Canada and reapply before coming back. This takes a month. My new job starts tomorrow. FML

Today, I looked outside with a grimace at the very heavy rainfall through which I had to trudge a long way. I waited ten minutes for it to let up, only to find it was getting heavier. So, I started walking anyway. After getting soaked to the bone, I walked through my door, and it stopped. FML

#6567940
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23981) - you deserved it (2948)

On 12/02/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by Furry (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML

#7540376
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25881) - you deserved it (2948)

On 01/24/2010 at 7:28am - animals - by CheeseMonsters (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I decided to pay a surprise visit to my family after I got some work leave. I drove over and knocked on the door, and a young couple answered. Apparently, my entire family decided to move to Texas, and didn't bother to tell me. FML

#17009779
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37953) - you deserved it (2948)

On 07/07/2011 at 1:53am - misc - by danielle887 - United States

Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML

#19642292
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27715) - you deserved it (2948)

On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boss called me over to his office; he wanted me to fire four hardworking employees. One of them was the girl I was going to ask out. FML

#20447887
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37102) - you deserved it (2948)

On 01/08/2013 at 11:40am - work - by AnonUser464 (man) - United States

Today, my neighbour was practicing his opera singing, drunk. FML

#20869663
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32040) - you deserved it (2948)

On 09/05/2013 at 11:27pm - misc - by Thesuz - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went para sailing for the first time ever. My friends thought it would be funny to pull down my trunks right before my feet left the boat. I dangled there in the air for the whole resort to see. And I lost my shorts in the ocean. FML

#5039169
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39774) - you deserved it (2947)

On 09/04/2009 at 10:50am - misc - by no_hullabalo (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-wan)

Today, I was making a snowman with my little cousin. I was collecting snow just outside the house, when out of nowhere a snowball struck me in the back of the head and caused me to headbutt the wall. I woke up a short while later to a medic telling me I had a nasty concussion. Thanks, cousin. FML

#14410593
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21530) - you deserved it (2947)

On 12/31/2010 at 3:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that my stepbrother has been telling his friends that I'm his girlfriend. FML

#20985907
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45174) - you deserved it (2947)

On 12/09/2013 at 12:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was taking a final test online that would account for 65% of my final grade. I had worked extremely hard in that class. I had one submission for the test. My roommate thought it would be funny to click the "Submit All" Button while i was getting a glass of water. I got a 13%. FML

#6230724
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38163) - you deserved it (2946)

On 11/09/2009 at 5:13pm - work - by Failure (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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Tuesday 22 July 2014

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