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Today, I took a week off work because my father passed away. I was at the funeral home making arrangements when I overheard the owners complaining about how their insurance agent had left them to fend for themselves. I'm their insurance agent. FML

#20531557
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27970) - you deserved it (3130)

On 03/04/2013 at 10:38pm - work - by KathleenSchuler - United States

Today, I lost my dog and so I put up 'lost' signs. As I was coming back home I noticed one had been written on. It said: "Found your dog. Keeping it". FML

#20556107
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48976) - you deserved it (3130)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:43am - animals - by Hurrikhan - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, while visiting my mother, she asked my son who his favorite parent was. As a growing boy, he chose his father. I don't mind, except she then asked, "So, whose side are you taking in the divorce?" My husband and I have no marital issues. My son refuses to believe us. FML

#20932049
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41941) - you deserved it (3130)

On 10/24/2013 at 2:05am - kids - by he's still not convinced (woman) - United States

Today, I googled myself in preparation for my upcoming job interview. Turns out there's a girl on Twitter with my name and age who tweets nonstop about getting wasted and being on probation. She won't make her profile private. FML

#20944947
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43850) - you deserved it (3130)

On 11/04/2013 at 7:08am - work - by twitterfailsme (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, after spending the night at my boyfriend's house, I was heading out the door when he called me back to hand me something I had left at his house a while ago. It was one of my bras. It wasn't until I got home I noticed the cup size was a B. I'm a size D. FML

#5793805
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36114) - you deserved it (3129)

On 10/12/2009 at 10:03am - love - by Jennagirl (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I found out my broker invested my $6000 in the wrong stock. How did I find out? He called me to let me know the stock crashed. FML

#8132919
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24811) - you deserved it (3129)

On 02/11/2010 at 3:13pm - money - by extants - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my dad finally told me why he never paid child support to my mom when he was supposed to for the last ten years. His reason? Because I'm a girl and I wasn't that important. FML

#13397111
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31135) - you deserved it (3129)

On 10/10/2010 at 8:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I made plans with an old friend that I haven't seen in years. We agreed to meet at a diner and I told him I'd be standing outside. I watched him pull up, look right at me, then do something with his phone. Seconds later, I got a text saying "Sorry, but I'm busy today and can't make it." FML

#15130627
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32912) - you deserved it (3129)

On 02/26/2011 at 8:56pm - misc - by Angela (woman) - United States

Today, I opened my new clothing store. My only customer was my mom and the only reason she came in was to tell me that someone stole my sign. FML

#16307240
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34397) - you deserved it (3129)

On 05/23/2011 at 12:26am - work - by 11lyss1 -

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32286) - you deserved it (3129)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my friends staged an intervention. I'm not on drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, and I own my own house. My car is paid for and my job pays well. Apparently, I need an intervention because my life is not where they want it to be, which involves me being married with children. FML

#17004757
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35517) - you deserved it (3129)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized I have to choose between being unemployed or putting up with my perverted boss who desperately wants me. I'm a guy and so is he. FML

#18201321
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38435) - you deserved it (3129)

On 11/09/2011 at 12:20pm - work - by Anonymous - Romania (Mures)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that I fart when I'm tickled enough. The best part was when he decided to show his family. FML

#18393889
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29237) - you deserved it (3129)

On 11/30/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by Madi - United States (California)



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