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Today, my boyfriend told me he likes to do things the old-fashioned way, and that he wouldn't propose to me without my father's blessing. My dad died 3 years ago, and he knows it. FML

#21232717
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46706) - you deserved it (3176)

On 08/08/2014 at 6:53pm - love - by lonethong15 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the gym to run. I ended up at the hospital because i went into anaphylactic shock. Apparently I'm allergic to exercise now. FML

#36818
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33987) - you deserved it (3175)

On 02/13/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I found my underwear in my brother's pillow as well as my vibrator and Victoria's Secret magazines. FML

#6841457
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23391) - you deserved it (3176)

On 12/20/2009 at 2:13am - intimacy - by VCR (woman) - United States (California)

Today, out of all the cars in the parking lot, mine got struck by lightning. FML

#13442397
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36630) - you deserved it (3175)

On 10/14/2010 at 3:15am - misc - by A. - United States

Today, at my internship, I was told we were going to do something fun. I was excited, until I found out that this "fun" thing was labeling 500 folders. FML

#19017248
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19771) - you deserved it (3175)

On 02/07/2012 at 10:07am - work - by strongjon60 - United States

Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML

#20554170
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47465) - you deserved it (3175)

On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons of gum" is not an actual alternative to brushing his teeth. FML

#20546477
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29133) - you deserved it (3175)

On 03/16/2013 at 5:52pm - misc - by Dat Stanky Mouf (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

#20928358
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41416) - you deserved it (3175)

On 10/20/2013 at 11:51pm - kids - by momaaa1342 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boss pretty much told me that I'm too ugly to meet clients, and should stay in the office doing the paperwork. So basically, I'm a modern day Hunchback of Notre Dame. FML

#21232284
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37052) - you deserved it (3175)

On 08/08/2014 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML

#6842444
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39988) - you deserved it (3174)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, some Juggalos mocked me for the way I was dressed. Juggalos giving sartorial advice, really? FML

#19491584
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15802) - you deserved it (3174)

On 04/18/2012 at 7:08pm - misc - by amazed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was at work, I was on the verge of tears. My coworker asked what was wrong and I explained that I recently had to put my dog down. He then replied, "Cool story, bro. Tell it again." FML

#20565029
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36532) - you deserved it (3174)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:23am - work - by CoolStoryBro -

Today, I dragged myself to work, suffering from a bad cold. My boss quietly told me to go home and rest, to avoid spreading it around the office. I thought it odd since he dislikes me so much, but I did as he said. He called later in the day to suspend me for leaving work early. FML

#20823652
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50524) - you deserved it (3174)

On 08/06/2013 at 10:44am - work - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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