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Today, while trying to change my visiting cousin's opinion about our state being "redneck and white trash", we stumbled upon a proposal/celebration in a Walmart. So much for changing her opinion. FML

#20066095
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17371) - you deserved it (3423)

On 09/10/2012 at 8:48am - misc - by liquidknight - United States

Today, I woke up to find my new roommate staring straight at me. She then went on to say, "I love how you sleep," and continued to stare. I live in a residence off campus and I've already changed roommates twice this year. I'm stuck with a person who stares at me sleep for the next two years. FML

#13789372
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27207) - you deserved it (3423)

On 11/10/2010 at 11:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Argentina (Cordoba)

Today, my crush gave me a ride home. When I opened the door to get out, he switched the gear to reverse, thinking the car was in park. I got run over by the car door. FML

#15354612
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30958) - you deserved it (3423)

On 03/17/2011 at 5:26pm - misc - by boom - United States (Maryland)

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML

#21282365
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37166) - you deserved it (3423)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:42am - misc - by youngboob (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

#21287735
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32470) - you deserved it (3423)

On 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm - kids - by lexigan4 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my dad asked me to unpack the groceries he'd brought home. When he saw me come across a bottle of lube, then he told me how my mom had hit menopause and, as a result, her vaginal dryness made sex harder for the two of them. FML

#2173533
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63035) - you deserved it (3422)

On 05/22/2009 at 4:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at an estate sale of my neighbor who recently passed. I recognized many items for sale that I had ordered or won on eBay from the past 8 years. Turns out the little old lady had been stealing my mail for close to a decade. FML

#20496903
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38012) - you deserved it (3422)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:24am - misc - by GarageSallin (man) -

Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML

#20902425
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46225) - you deserved it (3422)

On 09/30/2013 at 7:54pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, after returning from taking my sister off to college, my parents told me that our house would be a lot quieter with my sister gone. Not because she's loud, but because she has friends and I apparently don't. FML

#21252132
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36439) - you deserved it (3422)

On 09/04/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by AllieG33 - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was delivering pizza in the rain. A woman answered the door, saw me soaking wet and said, "Wow this rain is terrible, it must be horrible to be out delivering in it." She then tipped me 21 cents. FML

#14391490
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27328) - you deserved it (3421)

On 12/30/2010 at 2:48am - work - by ronniewciv -

Today, I emailed 10 parents inviting them to my son's birthday party. All 10 emailed back saying their kids had to get a cavity filled. FML

#20517380
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32980) - you deserved it (3421)

On 02/22/2013 at 9:51am - kids - by Paris101 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my family and I visited my cousins in Virginia. When we arrived, we found that they already had guests over. I've stuttered my whole life, so when they asked me what my name was, I stuttered for several seconds trying to say my name. Everyone burst out laughing. FML

#20805698
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52421) - you deserved it (3421)

On 07/27/2013 at 12:47am - misc - by Odnel (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail after he punched a convenience store clerk in the face for running out of Cheetos. FML

#20867149
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39967) - you deserved it (3421)

On 09/04/2013 at 3:00am - kids - by ven980 - United States (Oklahoma)



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