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Today, I found out that I'm highly-placed in my wrestling competition this year. I also found out that I have mono and won't be able to take part for at least the first half of the competition. FML

#20939045
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35976) - you deserved it (3592)

On 10/30/2013 at 12:43pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my sister introduced our parents to her new boyfriend. He's my boyfriend, and he told me he was going to be out of state for a few weeks on business. FML

Today, I was pouring boiling water into a cup, and I accidentally spilled it all over my hand. My mother responded by slapping me for getting water everywhere. My hand is scorched red, but thanks, I love you too, mother. FML

#20948987
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40867) - you deserved it (3592)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:12pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, I walked in on my dad singing along to a song on Sesame Street. He tried to divert attention from what I'd just witnessed by angrily grilling me over "just barging in" and not respecting people's privacy. Apparently he forgot that we were in the living room. FML

#21062479
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37306) - you deserved it (3593)

On 02/16/2014 at 2:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had to explain to my father why it isn't a good idea to shove a metal knife into the toaster when trying to get at a small piece of toast. This man is 45-years-old and has a PhD. FML

Today, I told my husband I felt unfulfilled and unhappy in my life. He suggested I do more chores. FML

#21405437
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28285) - you deserved it (3592)

On 05/06/2015 at 12:13am - misc - by msleea - United States (California)

Today, I was running late and rushing to a waiting bus. I made it to the doors just as they closed. I knocked desperately, hoping the driver would let me in. He hovered his hand over the button for a few seconds, then flipped me off and drove away laughing. FML

#14325917
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32935) - you deserved it (3591)

On 12/24/2010 at 5:32pm - misc - by hahahano (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML

#15264127
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33359) - you deserved it (3591)

On 03/10/2011 at 4:42pm - love - by dumped (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML

#19397932
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33843) - you deserved it (3591)

On 04/02/2012 at 10:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML

#20400337
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34409) - you deserved it (3591)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was reviewing documents at work, only to find one of my coworkers has been signing off on paperwork, claiming he's been walking one of the residents daily. Aside from being a double leg amputee, the patient died two weeks ago. The state review board comes this week. FML

#21198473
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37269) - you deserved it (3591)

On 07/04/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by cakefete2 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44652) - you deserved it (3591)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got in an argument with an ex-girlfriend who kept tactlessly bragging to me about her new boyfriend. I told her to read what she'd sent me, then pretend her boyfriend was telling her that. Fifteen minutes later, her boyfriend calls me, yelling for making her feel sad. FML

#21384606
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30792) - you deserved it (3591)

On 03/31/2015 at 5:35am - love - by lucasbeck99 (man) - United States (Texas)



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