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Today, I was walking home from the gym. I was thinking about how proud of myself I was for losing 34 pounds when someone yelled from a car window, "Look at that fat lump!" FML

#14805618
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35568) - you deserved it (3629)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:07am - health - by notafatlump -

Today, my boss ate a small piece of paper off her desk, thinking it was frosting. I have to work for this woman. FML

#16322705
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29121) - you deserved it (3629)

On 05/24/2011 at 12:38am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, at my boyfriend's house, I met his mother for the first time. And promptly fell in their pond. FML

#17584305
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23189) - you deserved it (3629)

On 08/26/2011 at 6:41am - love - by the girlfriend (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my mom bitched me out, calling me a selfish pig and saying that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm so conceited. All of this because I started watching the latest episodes of Breaking Bad without her. FML

#20026224
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21072) - you deserved it (3629)

On 08/17/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by elijah (man) - United States

Today, while working at my job at a nursing home, I slipped and fell. It wouldn't be so bad if it was just water. No, one of the residents had just had an "accident". FML

#20740385
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44440) - you deserved it (3629)

On 06/22/2013 at 3:20am - work - by no name - United States (Michigan)

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

#20724048
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53065) - you deserved it (3629)

On 06/13/2013 at 6:12pm - misc - by thatisfuckedup - United Kingdom

Today, I celebrated my birthday with my friend who has the same birthday by going out to dinner with a bunch of our friends. The waiter brought out a cake for my friend but not for me. No one noticed my exclusion. I sang happy birthday on my birthday. FML

#109688
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57107) - you deserved it (3628)

On 02/22/2009 at 11:05pm - misc - by jet8725 - United States (Virginia)

Today, It took me more than 4 hours to set up the back yard for my daughters baby shower. It only took my husband one push of a button to turn on the sprinklers. FML

#3143801
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46328) - you deserved it (3628)

On 06/23/2009 at 11:47am - misc - by stew (woman) - United States (Oregon)

­Today, my dog decided to fly through the front door like Superman. All 180lbs of her promptly slammed sideways into the wall, putting a dog-sized hole in the plaster. FML

#15726248
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28144) - you deserved it (3628)

On 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm - animals - by a man - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML

#16722873
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53454) - you deserved it (3628) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/18/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Inconnu - France

Today, my mother refused to agree with any of my logic because it's "not in the bible." She can't find any fault with it, just refuses to agree with it. FML

#18491366
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26723) - you deserved it (3628)

On 12/12/2011 at 1:00am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while looking through pictures of my boyfriend and me on Facebook, I noticed that in practically every single one featuring my best friend, his eyes are directed down her shirt. FML

#19905936
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27869) - you deserved it (3628)

On 07/07/2012 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, during a job interview, I was offered a sandwich. I politely declined, explaining that I'm a coeliac and would probably get very sick. He said coeliac disease "isn't real" and that gluten-free eating is just a fad. I had to leave when he kept pushing me to accept it. FML

#20976563
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41711) - you deserved it (3628)

On 12/01/2013 at 1:02am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway



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