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Today, I took my first day off in 3 weeks just so I can sleep in. The office secretary woke me up at 7.12 am with a page wishing me a nice day off. FML

#6823511
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25090) - you deserved it (3489)

On 12/19/2009 at 2:39am - work - by Hareega (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I called my boyfriend's job to ask him a question. His co-worker answered the phone, and when I asked for my boyfriend, he assumed I was someone else. Who exactly would that someone else be? FML

#14238369
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24387) - you deserved it (3489)

On 12/17/2010 at 7:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while standing in line at the grocery store, the elderly lady in front of me had forgotten to pay for her milk. In the spirit of the season, I paid for it and wished her happy holidays. She snatched the milk and gave me an ugly look. Then huffed at me before stomping off. FML

#14048564
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31870) - you deserved it (3489)

On 12/01/2010 at 3:18pm - misc - by sumerflame07 (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was on a flight home. I wasn't going to arrive until midnight, so I was offered an earlier flight that got back at ten. I got to baggage claims and it turned out they lost my bag. I sat there for 2 hours. The people on my original flight left for home before I did. FML

#16733710
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29142) - you deserved it (3489)

On 06/18/2011 at 7:54pm - misc - by me - United States (Colorado)

Today, I saw someone purposely drive into someone's garbage can with their car. Trying to be nice, I stopped and started to pick it up. As I did, the owner came out of his house and chased me away with a knife. FML

#21250496
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36879) - you deserved it (3489)

On 09/02/2014 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, before work, I was quickly cleaning when I tripped and the side of my neck hit the countertop, causing a dark bruise. During work, people wouldn't stop giving me high fives for getting laid and I was too embarrassed to tell them truth that I'm not desirable, just clumsy. FML

#21277907
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31939) - you deserved it (3489)

On 10/14/2014 at 8:13pm - misc - by ForeverAlone - United States (South Dakota)

Today, our school went to an elementary school to read to the kids. One of the girls in my group asked me if she could switch into another group, so I asked her what was wrong with mine. She said, "Nothing, I wanna be in her group. She's prettier." I was insulted by a kindergartner. FML

#263289
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48226) - you deserved it (3488)

On 03/10/2009 at 6:51pm - misc - by thanksjill (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my landlord came and beat on my door demanding the rent check. I just got home from a trip and my wife was supposed to pay it while I was away. What happened to the money? Black Friday. FML

#18515072
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28598) - you deserved it (3488)

On 12/14/2011 at 9:46pm - money - by kittyslayer (man) - United States

Today, I got my license. Instead of congratulating me, my buddies created a betting pool for when I get into a serious accident. Thanks for the support. FML

#19412745
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20630) - you deserved it (3488)

On 04/05/2012 at 4:07pm - misc - by anal4me (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was cutting a client's hair, and she was complaining about how itchy her head was from having it too long. As I lay down my comb and shears, three lice bugs ran across my counter. FML

Today, my boss made me cover for him by working two extra hours, because he had to rush home early to deal with an "emergency". The emergency was taking a shit, because he claims to have a phobia of doing them anywhere but at home. FML

#20967954
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38115) - you deserved it (3488)

On 11/23/2013 at 1:33pm - work - by AFSDALK:AFSDQWE (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be romantic to take me to a strip club for our 1-year anniversary. FML

#21382971
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28365) - you deserved it (3488)

On 03/28/2015 at 1:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with a girl from home who I'd wanted for a long time. She has low blood pressure problems though, and when things got hot, she passed out while she was on top of me, fell and hit her head on the night stand. FML

#6481
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46183) - you deserved it (3487)

On 02/03/2009 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by BRELLA (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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