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Today, my parents bought me a wine glass with "Who needs a man?" painted all over it. Cute, until after dinner my mom looked me in the eyes and asked with complete sincerity, "Kara, are you gay?" My parents tried to get me to come out. I'm straight. FML

#2140497
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48252) - you deserved it (3114)

On 05/21/2009 at 9:06am - misc - by pa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found my brand new tropical fish dead in its tank because my boyfriend got drunk last night and decided to pour red wine into the aquarium. FML

#5968472
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30608) - you deserved it (3114)

On 10/24/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Brinty (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I are divorcing because HE had an affair. He now wants a paternity test. FML

#14024003
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31073) - you deserved it (3115)

On 11/29/2010 at 2:20pm - kids - by preggers - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's mom's house for the first time. They had a cook-out so I got to meet his whole entire family. I went into the kitchen to find a huge picture of his ex-girlfriend on his mom's fridge. FML

#11163519
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34463) - you deserved it (3114)

On 06/13/2010 at 3:48am - love - by Yup (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after disappearing for an unusually long period of time, my boss called the store phone while sitting on the toilet. Turns out she'd started bleeding uncontrollably from the arse, and as the only other female staff member, she needed me to go help her. FML

#15151790
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31433) - you deserved it (3114)

On 02/28/2011 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, my mom still hasn't gotten over the novelty of our brand new microwave. We've been eating hot pockets for nearly a week now. FML

#17281268
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25014) - you deserved it (3114)

On 07/27/2011 at 7:45pm - misc - by ladytyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom had an appointment with my teacher after class. She never showed. My teacher ended up driving me home. FML

#16560118
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35239) - you deserved it (3114)

On 06/08/2011 at 9:03am - work - by iloveyoutoomom (man) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, my parents got a new dog. It attacks me every time I laugh. FML

#18714310
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27027) - you deserved it (3114)

On 01/05/2012 at 7:06am - animals - by Imgonnahaveabf - United States

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend pulling off scabs and eating them. My scabs. FML

#19448273
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37615) - you deserved it (3114)

On 04/11/2012 at 5:53am - health - by Scabby (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my husband's recent obsession with The Sopranos since James Gandolfini died went a step further into the ridiculous, when he tried to encourage some ducks to land in our swimming pool by throwing loaves of bread into it, while bellowing at them with a 'Noo Joisey' Wise Guy accent. FML

#20770230
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31615) - you deserved it (3114)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by Not Mrs Soprano (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I told my 10 year old brother I was turning 23. He said, "You need to get a boyfriend." FML

#1565
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20654) - you deserved it (3113)

On 01/18/2009 at 9:30am - kids - by NVP - United States (Ohio)

Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML

#15029375
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30423) - you deserved it (3113)

On 02/18/2011 at 4:36pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, at my internship, I was told we were going to do something fun. I was excited, until I found out that this "fun" thing was labeling 500 folders. FML

#19017248
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19227) - you deserved it (3113)

On 02/07/2012 at 10:07am - work - by strongjon60 - United States



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