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Today, my dad decided to clean my 20 gallon fish tank. I had 6 fish. One of them was called a transparent fish, clear with a bright orange tail, which was my favorite. My dad didn't see it, and dumped the water out along with it. FML

#6254923
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33051) - you deserved it (3652)

On 11/11/2009 at 6:28am - animals - by dEpPrEsSeDgIrL (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML

#17625902
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33754) - you deserved it (3652)

On 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by mystupidson (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I saw someone purposely drive into someone's garbage can with their car. Trying to be nice, I stopped and started to pick it up. As I did, the owner came out of his house and chased me away with a knife. FML

#21250496
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38305) - you deserved it (3652)

On 09/02/2014 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was told by my boyfriend's parents to never come back to his house again, and was given a lecture about rule breaking. Apparently, curfew is midnight, and he isn't allowed to have girls over. This didn't sound so unreasonable until I remembered that we're both almost 30. FML

Today, while dancing at my studio, our instructor was giving us all characters opposite of ourselves to portray in an improv solo. My friends got cool things like "creepy" and "vulnerable". I got "extremely sexy". FML

#18085773
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28550) - you deserved it (3651)

On 10/27/2011 at 12:00am - misc - by apparentlyunsexy - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my class to name some West African countries. Several of them thought Ebola was a country. I teach an AP history class. FML

#21400396
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33958) - you deserved it (3651)

On 04/27/2015 at 12:58am - work - by advanced history teacher (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got married. During the reception my husband got drunk and told 200+ people that we met at a dingy bar and that we "totally banged" all night. I don't know what's worse, the fact he embarrassed me in front of everyone I know, or if it was that that was not how we met. Not even close. FML

#12231460
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39159) - you deserved it (3650)

On 07/31/2010 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by wtf (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my girlfriend of one month and I had an amazing night of dinner and dancing, but when I leaned in to kiss her, she said, "You're joking right?" FML

#41639
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40877) - you deserved it (3649)

On 02/14/2009 at 12:35pm - misc - by semi-depressed (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought a puppy. I just found out I can't bring it on the family trip. To save me the trouble of finding a friend to take her in, my mum handed her back to the pound. FML

#6969552
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32974) - you deserved it (3649)

On 12/27/2009 at 3:48am - misc - by DroopyDog (woman) - Netherlands (Flevoland)

Today, my parents found several drawings of a dinosaur girl in various bondage equipment posing seductively in my purse. The drawings weren't mine, nor do I have any idea where they came from, but my parents now think I'm a freak. FML

#14022064
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29344) - you deserved it (3649)

On 11/29/2010 at 9:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I emailed 10 parents inviting them to my son's birthday party. All 10 emailed back saying their kids had to get a cavity filled. FML

#20517380
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35634) - you deserved it (3649)

On 02/22/2013 at 9:51am - kids - by Paris101 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I let my sister hold my newborn daughter for the first time. I heard her mutter under her breath, "I could kill you so easily..." FML

Today, I went into my former workplace. While there, an ex-coworker told me that after I quit, they split my position into two separate jobs. When I worked there, my boss had told me to suck it up whenever I said there was too much work for just one person. FML

#21209204
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46298) - you deserved it (3649)

On 07/14/2014 at 7:52pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)



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