Saturday 16 February 2013 
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Today, I was super hungry and went to a Thai restaurant. The waitress left two small bowls of fried rice on the counter, and I thought they were for me. I ate one and a lady came over screaming. Apparently the small cups of rice was part of a religious ceremony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20607) - you deserved it (12241)
On 02/12/2013 at 3:04am - misc - by Thai rice mistake - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend finally said that she finally felt ready to have sex with me. It ended up being so terrible that I only managed to get some pleasure out of it when my mind drifted to the thought of going to Olive Garden later and eating some of their breadsticks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27931) - you deserved it (6229)
On 02/15/2013 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by Acolyte of the Bacon God (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimed he somehow "fell onto". It was lodged up his nostril. I'm marrying this man in a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21164) - you deserved it (3372)
On 02/15/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Venezuela (Lara)
Today, after more than a year of being single, I finally had sex. Unfortunately, it was only in a dream, and after we finished, he told me that I'm terrible in bed. Even my dream-lover is a dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25543) - you deserved it (3196)
On 02/17/2013 at 2:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Botswana (North-East)
Today, my leadership class was trying to decide who would run the kissing booth in our local carnival. Someone suggested me, to which the director replied, "We'd never make any profit with her." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26091) - you deserved it (2268)
On 02/17/2013 at 10:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I felt like letting my ex know just how I felt about all the bullshit he put me through. I dug up his number, typed a long paragraph with lots of pain and emotion, and sent it. The reply: "No wonder he broke up with you." Thanks, whoever has that number now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8901) - you deserved it (29555)
On 02/18/2013 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4980) - you deserved it (32867)
On 02/21/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I got my very first yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25585) - you deserved it (1663)
On 02/12/2013 at 6:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20535) - you deserved it (2154)
On 02/19/2013 at 6:07pm - love - by Forever alone Guy - Australia (Victoria)
Today, the guy I like asked me out for the first time. It's a good thing he did it over Facebook, because I started shaking and almost threw up. I don't know how I'm going to function on our date next week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22822) - you deserved it (5391)
On 02/20/2013 at 2:31am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18650) - you deserved it (5849)
On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)
Today, l took my new boyfriend to the place where my ex and I used to hook up, only to find out that my ex and his new girl had the same idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10662) - you deserved it (37699)
On 02/22/2013 at 1:12am - intimacy - by wrongplacewrongtime - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22704) - you deserved it (4198)
On 02/13/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by please leave... - United States (Texas)
Friday 24 May 2013
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