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Thursday 17 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mum excitedly discussed with me the prospect of starting a mother-son YouTube duo. Thinking she was joking, I went along with it. She is now installing a 24-hour webcam in the house to record our conversations, which she perceives as hilarious, and is going to upload them. FML

#20458570
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26586) - you deserved it (6889)

On 01/14/2013 at 5:06am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was babysitting, and a little girl asked for help with her homework. I cheerfully began an explanation, only to freeze mid-sentence. I could not for the life of me remember how to do long-division. I'm about to graduate from Cornell University, and her little brother had to correct me. FML

#20459773
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23271) - you deserved it (6684)

On 01/14/2013 at 9:52pm - kids - by IvyLeague? - United States (New York)

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML

#20462057
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31247) - you deserved it (1871)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:36am - health - by Ari (woman) -

Today, my parents have kept their bet going about not turning the heat on all season. I woke up this morning to it being the same temperature inside as it was outside. It's snowing out there. FML

#20470349
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23017) - you deserved it (1176)

On 01/20/2013 at 10:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I visited my family. Over the course of 2 hours, my brother punched me, and my mom slapped me across the face after drinking way too much wine. When I started gathering my things to leave, my mom started crying about how I don't visit enough. FML

#20474780
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27321) - you deserved it (1939)

On 01/23/2013 at 12:45pm - misc - by mariama (woman) - United States

Today, I was discussing with my husband how it was time I stopped taking birth control so we could have a baby. He looked at me and said sincerely, "We're a little young to be having kids, don't you think?". He's 35 and I'm 32. FML

#20469230
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25993) - you deserved it (3439)

On 01/20/2013 at 8:13am - love - by StillTooYoung (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend's mom bought us matching purity rings. FML

#20470370
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23371) - you deserved it (3668)

On 01/20/2013 at 10:55pm - love - by airrinw_33 - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I discovered that my downstairs neighbor is running a business out of her apartment. Or I should say, her pimp is. FML

#20473717
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21760) - you deserved it (1381)

On 01/22/2013 at 8:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

#20460703
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32640) - you deserved it (3721)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at the doctor's for a regular check-up. When my appointment was over and I was about to walk out, she yelled across the room in front of everyone, "Oh and if you could lose some weight, that'd be great." FML

#20462226
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25483) - you deserved it (4687)

On 01/16/2013 at 5:48am - health - by ChubbyButt (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me all about how his parents sat him down last night and had a 20 minute talk with him about how I'm the biggest mistake he'll ever make. FML

#20468803
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25632) - you deserved it (2643)

On 01/20/2013 at 12:01am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at the gym, my boyfriend wouldn't stop texting me. I was confident enough to text while on the treadmill. Bad idea: I hit myself on the bar and tripped in front of everyone. FML

#20472626
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7700) - you deserved it (24557)

On 01/22/2013 at 1:50am - love - by Roxy19 - United States (California)

Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML

#20458321
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28469) - you deserved it (2030)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:52am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)



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