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Saturday 5 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend knocked into me with his car. I drove myself to the hospital because he couldn't stop laughing long enough to drive. FML

#20434038
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30532) - you deserved it (2830)

On 12/31/2012 at 1:13pm - misc - by anon - United States (California)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML

#20442898
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24835) - you deserved it (4534)

On 01/04/2013 at 7:56pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, I found out that I was pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I got his newly updated Facebook status that read "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML

#20444550
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25347) - you deserved it (7076)

On 01/06/2013 at 3:17am - misc - by kiken.bara - United States

Today, during the countdown to midnight, I looked for my girlfriend so I could kiss her as 2013 began. I found her just in time to see her making out with some guy she swore was "only a friend." FML

#20435586
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47129) - you deserved it (3389)

On 01/01/2013 at 2:50am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I visited my grandparents' house. While getting a drink from the fridge, I noticed the Christmas card my family sent them had my face scratched out. When I confronted them about it, they said it was the cat. They don't have a cat. FML

#20445318
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23770) - you deserved it (1858)

On 01/06/2013 at 7:50pm - misc - by HatedGrandson - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML

#20446350
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29429) - you deserved it (3037)

On 01/07/2013 at 3:09pm - love - by Sawarski - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my crush, who had asked me out on a date. Assuming he'd pay, I left my money at home. When the time came to buy the tickets, he only bought one for himself. FML

#20448091
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24419) - you deserved it (65168)

On 01/08/2013 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous001 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got into an accident on my motorcycle. When I told my wife that the doctor said I couldn't have sex for two weeks, she couldn't contain her joy. FML

#20447288
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43778) - you deserved it (8321)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mom made up a new game. She thinks it's hilarious to hide my brother's creepy Batman toy around the house to creep me out. This has been going on for hours and I still scream every time. FML

#20454752
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24433) - you deserved it (9529)

On 01/12/2013 at 1:36am - misc - by poohanne - United States (Louisiana)

Today, instead of the traditional midnight kiss, my husband handed me divorce papers. FML

#20436006
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47345) - you deserved it (5301)

On 01/01/2013 at 10:15am - misc - by Sarah - United States

Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML

#20442364
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28277) - you deserved it (6953)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:08am - love - by damn (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML

#20438672
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41340) - you deserved it (9440)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML

#20438400
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9983) - you deserved it (43969)

On 01/02/2013 at 10:01am - misc - by AmberHavoc - United Kingdom



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