Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Saturday 29 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today , I had to watch my drunk girlfriend yell at a cat 4 not having periods. The worst part is that she was at a pet store. The pet store athich I work. FML

#20431107
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29789) - you deserved it (3402)

On 12/30/2012 at 12:20am - misc - by Wtf is wrong with her (man) - Canada (Ontario)

YESTERDAY I GOT SO DRUNK THAT I DECIDED IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO GET NAKED AN JUMP ON A TRAMPOLINE IN THE BACK OF A NEIGHBOUR’S GARDEN. SAID NEIGHBOUR IS A POLICE OFFICER. FML

#20438400
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9106) - you deserved it (41375)

On 01/02/2013 at 10:01am - misc - by AmberHavoc - United Kingdom

Today, After Having Sex For The First Time With Mah Girlfriend, I Realisd I Was In Love With Her!! I Noticd She Had An Eyelash On Her Breast!! After Tugging It A Few Times I Realisd It Was Actually A Single Black Nipple Hair!! She Was So Embarrassd, She Kickd Me Out And Now Won't Return Mah Calls!! Big Fat FML

#20426821
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32725) - you deserved it (25256)

On 12/27/2012 at 10:06pm - intimacy - by ohman (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

2day I overeard my moter telling my sister tat se expects my marriage to fall apart any day now. Apparently , I ave no concept of wat "marriage" really means. My usband and I just celebrated our 7t anniversary , wile my moter is planning er 5t wedding. FML

#20438192
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42671) - you deserved it (2034)

On 01/02/2013 at 5:31am - love - by alynna007 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today..!! I took mah girlfriand to go saa Las Misérablas!! I triad to stay tough but complataly lost it an startad sobbing whan Anna Hathaway bagan singing!! looool My girlfriand callad ma a wimp an stayad dry-ayad throughout tha whola movia!! I'm dating a robot!! FML

#20439162
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31827) - you deserved it (13957)

On 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm - misc - by Les Miserables is so sad (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I pausd the movie mah grlfriend an I were watching an told her, 4 the frst time, that I lovd her. Her response was to stare at me silently 4 a few seconds before unpausing the film. mega FML

#20440422
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35923) - you deserved it (6484)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend calld me anti-social. To prove him wrong I textd one of my friends. She textd back, "Who's this??" big fat FML

#20442068
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19792) - you deserved it (7170)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a proper look at myself in the mirror. I have recently lost 5 lbs. Turns out that it mainly shows on boob. Not boobs. Boob. Right one only. FML

YESTERDAY MAH BOYFRIEND KNOCKED INTO ME WITH HIS CAR. I DROVE MYSELF TO THE HOSPITAL BECAUSE HE COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING LONG ENOUGH TO DRIVE. FML

#20434038
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30394) - you deserved it (2824)

On 12/31/2012 at 1:13pm - misc - by anon - United States (California)

Today, I bought an eye mask to help me sleep during the day, as I work night shifts . Upon waking up after my frst time using it, I forgot I was wearing it an thought I had gone blind, causing me to fall out of the bed an split my head open on my bedside table . FML

#20442267
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21929) - you deserved it (11704)

On 01/04/2013 at 5:13am - health - by idiot - Sweden

today I bought myself a pair of looool beautiful , hand-crafted earring with lighthouse on them. My mother was quick to point out the lighthouse look lyk dicks. I don't think I can ever wear them again. mega FML

TODAY, MY CAR WAS BROKEN INTO. WHAT WAS STOLEN? MY DAUGHTER'S $11 ONE DIRECTION POSTER. WHAT WILL IT COST TO FIX MY CAR? $1,000. REAL FML

#20427068
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37925) - you deserved it (3794)

On 12/27/2012 at 11:58pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today , my dad has decidd to that as a New Year's resolution , he's going to strive to wear pants less often. It's only been an hour and I can already tell it's going to be a long year. mega FML

#20435279
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26949) - you deserved it (2055)

On 01/01/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by why? - United States (New Jersey)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: