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Thursday 6 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was chatting to a friend on Facebook about girls, and why we're single. We somehow ended up admitting to one another that we'd never get girlfriends, finding out that we both like hentai porn, and trading info on Japanese sex toys. FML

#20196663
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9564) - you deserved it (29905)

On 12/08/2012 at 5:52pm - love - by XxtentaculonxX - United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute)

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

#20189050
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22693) - you deserved it (1599)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML

#20192045
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15297) - you deserved it (49717)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, I made a positive remark to the owner of my local groceries store for employing a special needs girl. Not only is the girl not mentally handicapped, she's also the owner's daughter. FML

#20190915
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11224) - you deserved it (29696)

On 12/04/2012 at 1:51pm - misc - by Vassy (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

#20199403
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27761) - you deserved it (7656)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me, and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

#20195284
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24814) - you deserved it (2873)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was snooping around in my parents' closet to see what I would get for Christmas, when I came across a UPS package. It was the video game I ordered off eBay 3 weeks ago, addressed to me. They told me it had never arrived and said I should ask Santa to bring it to me. FML

#20195835
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30642) - you deserved it (4674)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went Christmas shopping for my cat. I still haven't bought presents for my family, yet my cat already has several small gifts under the tree and an outfit to wear around the house. I really need a new hobby. FML

#20397631
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9194) - you deserved it (28043)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:04am - animals - by catlover - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a lady on the bus came up to me and asked if she could sit down. Thinking she meant the seat next to me, I said sure. She meant my lap. FML

#20198778
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24010) - you deserved it (2063)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:13am - misc - by LLCK - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was getting intimate with my current bootycall when he thought it would be funny to make animal sounds. He "baa-ed" "moo-ed" and "gobbled" until losing his erection from intense laughter, leaving me there very confused and unsatisfied. FML

#20198007
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29190) - you deserved it (9767)

On 12/09/2012 at 5:46pm - intimacy - by Bug5992 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

#20199630
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31258) - you deserved it (1980)

On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

#20194263
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27433) - you deserved it (1911)

On 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Matt8 (man) - United States

Today, my friend was complaining to me about her problems. I tried to be a good, understanding friend, listening and giving advice. When it was my turn to vent, she interrupted me, saying, "Sorry, but I don't really care." FML

#20201674
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30813) - you deserved it (2465)

On 12/12/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by sushichick (woman) - United States



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