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Sunday 25 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, it's the first day of my two-week stay at my in-laws' house. They forbid drinking, smoking, cursing, and anything even remotely sexual. I smuggled in my quietest toy to keep me sane in this holy house. If only I hadn't forgotten to bring the battery pack too. FML

#20184036
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12094) - you deserved it (14942)

On 11/29/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by comeuntome (woman) - United States

Today, my long distance boyfriend broke up with me. Tomorrow he should be expecting the super long love letter that I poured my heart into and sent him a week ago. FML

#20176109
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18804) - you deserved it (1343)

On 11/24/2012 at 2:02am - love - by whatever (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad went through all the trouble of sneaking onto my laptop and photoshopping a bong into my Facebook profile picture, apparently just so he could win a €20 bet with my mom, that hinged on her grounding me by December. FML

#20178213
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14180) - you deserved it (844)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I was mugged at gunpoint by a senior citizen. She now has a lousy $20, and I probably have PTSD. FML

#20182765
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13059) - you deserved it (1412)

On 11/28/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by stillshakinggd (man) - United States

Today, someone posted photos from a party I was at. On each photo I'm posing in with a girl, my hand is not touching her, but is hovering over her like some creepy weirdo loser. My Facebook nickname is now of course "Hover Hand." FML

#20171594
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5369) - you deserved it (14900)

On 11/20/2012 at 9:37pm - misc - by Hover Hand (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that the woman from My Strange Addiction who can't stop picking her scabs is married. I've been single for two years and I don't even pick my nose. FML

#20179069
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14282) - you deserved it (2477)

On 11/25/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by Sam (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my step-mom restarted the computer because she thought she'd downloaded a virus that stopped her from being able to click on anything, erasing my 7-page paper in the process. It turns out it was just the batteries dying in our wireless mouse. FML

#20180681
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16662) - you deserved it (8749)

On 11/27/2012 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while lighting a cigarette, I learned the hard way that the amount of styling mousse I used to get my curly hair to become manageable, is the roughly same amount that causes it to become highly flammable. FML

#20186892
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7537) - you deserved it (18481)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:11pm - health - by Awkward (woman) - Bahrain

Today, my mom found her CD of cats and dogs singing Christmas songs. That is what I'll be listening to until Christmas. FML

#20186305
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15145) - you deserved it (1076)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:00am - misc - by hinowdie - United States

Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML

#20170511
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13614) - you deserved it (1940)

On 11/20/2012 at 1:47am - kids - by lea5459 - United States (Oregon)

Today, at a talent show, my band got booed before we even started playing. FML

#20188582
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14672) - you deserved it (1812)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm - misc - by disembob - United Kingdom

Today, my dog climbed onto the dining room table to eat the cat's food. Then whined until I showed him how to get down. He does this every night. My dog is a genius. FML

#20171812
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10646) - you deserved it (2982)

On 11/21/2012 at 12:00am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, a customer at the Walmart I work at had a hissy fit and began throwing merchandise everywhere, including at my face, because we are Canadian and don't have a show called "Extreme Couponing" for "devoted shoppers" like her. FML

#20181556
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13455) - you deserved it (932)

On 11/27/2012 at 6:46pm - work - by ohgodwhy - Canada (Ontario)



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