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Friday 23 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

#20185753
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7086) - you deserved it (17144)

On 11/30/2012 at 7:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, Muse cancelled their upcoming show in Oslo. I bought my sold-out tickets on the black market for double the retail price, and have no way of getting my money back. FML

#20184120
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10589) - you deserved it (35106)

On 11/29/2012 at 4:12pm - misc - by faen (man) - Norway (Sogn og Fjordane)

Today, I got laid off. Why would they lay me off right before the holidays? Because they want to make sure every one else gets a nice holiday bonus. FML

#20173186
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22585) - you deserved it (1426)

On 11/21/2012 at 11:31pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was woken up by my elderly neighbor banging on my door at 2am. She needed "urgent" assistance as she had forgotten how to turn her TV off. I'd just fallen asleep. FML

#20184989
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18947) - you deserved it (1449)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:29am - misc - by Rachael (woman) - Australia

Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML

Today, my mom had a tantrum and screamed at me over my use of bronzer. She called me a selfish bitch and claimed that I'm somehow slowly giving myself skin cancer. FML

#20176711
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11916) - you deserved it (14857)

On 11/24/2012 at 2:38pm - health - by Anonymous Cunt (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I've now worked on Thanksgiving, Black Friday, the weekend after that, and two days this week. My husband and son have had all that time off, and yet I've still ended up having to clean the dishes and the house after them on all of these days. FML

#20181186
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24571) - you deserved it (4965)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:05pm - work - by bored - United States

Today, I called Costco to ask them not to renew my membership because of financial problems. The man on the phone spent 30 minutes telling me why I'm a fool to leave and I ended up with a renewed $55 membership and 25 minutes over my minute allowance. FML

Today, I was waiting in a doctor's office when I was approached by an elderly woman. She told me all about the ripping of her stitches in a very private place, in exhaustive detail. Of course, today was the day my doctor chose to be an hour late. FML

#20183071
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18029) - you deserved it (1313)

On 11/28/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML

#20175635
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16454) - you deserved it (2685)

On 11/23/2012 at 7:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I yet again purposely avoided the 'Health and Fitness' section on pinterest to keep my self-esteem up. FML

#20171929
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7250) - you deserved it (14881)

On 11/21/2012 at 1:20am - health - by fatty - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I met up with a few old friends for some wine and munchies. The main topics of conversation were colonoscopies, lactose intolerance and specific symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome. I'm sleeping over at one of their houses. Only 20 more hours to go. FML

#20184451
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15281) - you deserved it (2131)

On 11/29/2012 at 8:00pm - misc - by Randiluck (woman) - Canada



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