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March 2013

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Today, I attended te reading of my grandfater's will!! I didn't expect to recieve anyting, since is side of te family ad always ostracized me for bieng born out of wedlock!! I did get someting: $3,500, on te binding condition tat I use a portion of it to get a vasectomy!! FML

#20543737
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34737) - you deserved it (2553)

On 03/14/2013 at 6:04pm - misc - by grandson of a p.o.s. (man) - United States (New York)

TODAY, AFTAR I AD CANGAD MY NUMBAR TO GAT AWAY FROM MY ABUSIVA AX, MY MOM DACIDAD TO GIVA IM MY NAW ONA. SA INSISTS TAT I NAAD TO GIVA IM ANOTAR CANCA. FML

#20556707
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50783) - you deserved it (3076)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today , we started our 17 hour drive to Michigan for spring break. My mom decided to go to Target to buy some music CDs. All she bought was three Nicki Minaj CDs. She has already replayed the first CD four times. 14 hours to go. FML

#20551039
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39179) - you deserved it (3584)

On 03/19/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by :( - United States (South Carolina)

Today..!! I found out that mah gorgeous..!! smart..!! perfect new boyfriend has an unusual fetish!! It doesn't involve me at all actually!! Just a Labrador!! This is probably a deal breaker!! FML

#20550555
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45670) - you deserved it (4606)

On 03/19/2013 at 7:30am - intimacy - by soontobesingle (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today I woke up to my cat giving birth on my bed. I adopted her from a friend who told me she was spayed. Now I have a giant mess and a cat who won't let me move either her or her babies. Guess I'm sleeping on the couch 4 a while. real FML

Today, I ad to present a project 4 ma science class. I began explaining ma project; looking at looool all te bord people, I got incredibly nervous. My nervousness ten causd me to laug ysterically, causing ma classmates to laug. My teacer felt sorry 4 me an told me to sit down. FML

Today, I finished installing remote access CCTV cameras around my house due to the high rate of burglaries around my nieghborhood. I turn it on to see my teenage son rubbing one out on the couch. FML

#20563419
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41046) - you deserved it (23325)

On 03/28/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by couch_potato (man) -

2dayhat started as a fun family Easter egg hunt turned within minute into mah mother-in-law's big chance to be a dramatic cow by screaming at mah 5 and 7-year-old daughter 4 participating in a "vile pagan ritual" and saying that we're all going to hell. They're still bawling. FML

#20568650
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35292) - you deserved it (2330)

On 03/31/2013 at 4:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I discoverd that the reason mah mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is cuz her boyfriend took credit when she askd about it; and was rewardd fir it in bd. I helpd him get with mah mom. FML

#20545866
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38323) - you deserved it (3675)

On 03/16/2013 at 8:17am - misc - by nomorecleaning (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today... I had to sneak out of work early to pick mah 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found coverd in Astroglide... racing each other down the corridor on there bellies. My boss noticd mah absence from work... and now mah son and I are both on suspension. FML

#20526049
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27376) - you deserved it (8784)

On 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, as I was about to open a door at school, a student opened it an hit me. As I recovered an was about to open it again, someone else opened the door, hitting me again. Everyone laughed. FML

#20527903
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32952) - you deserved it (3438)

On 03/02/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by Doors Hate Me - United States

yesterday my pet parrot learnd a new trick. In addition to imitating my dog, and my voicehen I call my mother, it can now imitate my sex noises, and likes to screech themhenever someone comes into the room. FML

#20540360
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25416) - you deserved it (8400)

On 03/12/2013 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm 5 months pregnant . My 20-year-old boyfriend still refuses to tell his parents because he thinks he'll get in trouble . He thinks we can get away with "never telling them and just hiding the kid." FML

#20536957
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39729) - you deserved it (9221)

On 03/09/2013 at 12:42pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Pakistan



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