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February 2013

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Today.. . I got mah results on a recent.. . important midterm . During the exam.. . I'd noticed mah instructor had accidentally left an answers page in the test packet.. . so bieng honest.. . I didn't look at them . It turns out she did it on purpose to help us pass . I failed . FML

#20515105
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34071) - you deserved it (13949)

On 02/20/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by its ok to cheat!? - United States (California)

Today, my wife mentiond tat se wantd to give me a tree-way. I was ecstatic, until se opend er rigt and, only to reveal a 3-way ligtbulb. FML

#20512105
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16360) - you deserved it (38608)

On 02/18/2013 at 12:23pm - intimacy - by phatdaddy62 (man) - United States

Today.. . after supporting mah grlfriend 4 over a year in her endeavour to lose wieght.. . exercise more.. . and eat better.. . mah now-slender grlfriend dumpd me . Because now she find someone better than me . FML

#20518428
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47065) - you deserved it (3983)

On 02/23/2013 at 3:07am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

TODAY, THE GUY WHO CONFESSED HIS LOVE 4 ME ALSO CONFESSED THAT IN HIS RAGE, HE ALMOST SHOT THE LAST GIRL WHO BROKE HIS HEART. FML

#20518576
157 comments

yesterday I was at mah friend's house , when she commentd that her dog's fur kept getting tangld cuz of its length. I reachd over to tickle his tummy , felt a big tangld knot and agred that he needd a good grooming. Then I realizd what I'd grabbd wasn't fur. big fat FML

#20523003
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27626) - you deserved it (9521)

On 02/26/2013 at 1:09pm - animals - by Puppylove (woman) - United Kingdom

Today I moved in with my new dorm mate. I'm prone to very frequent panic attack that can only be alleviated by cold air. My roommate is severely anemic and has violent shivering fits when the temperature is below 80. No matter what one of us is alway shaking uncontrollably. FML

Today , I Got Married On Skyrim . To An Elf . Wile In Real Life , Ma Love Life Is Floundering Like A Alf-dead Carp In Te Surf On A Ot Day . So Muc So In Fact Tat I Actually Draw A Measure Of Comfort From Being Married To An Elf . FML

#20501864
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24210) - you deserved it (9630)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19am - love - by mr_loveless (man) - United States

TODAY, A TENANT IN MA APARTMENT BLOCK TOLD ME ABOUT A NICE SADY PLACE BEIND OUR BUILDINGERE E OFTEN GOES TO RELAX. CURIOUS, I WENT LOOKING FIR IT. IT WAS A QUIET AND SECLUDD COURTYARD. AT LEAST UNTIL A MAN CAME OUT OF NOWERE WAVING A AMMER IN MA FACE, SCREAMING IN A FOREIGN LANGUAGE. FML

#20495981
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23286) - you deserved it (2842)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant!! My husband had a vasectomy this past summer after our son was born an only took one of the two tests!! I haven't cheatd!! He refuses to believe me or get his spunk checkd again!! FML

#20500417
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34469) - you deserved it (3297)

On 02/10/2013 at 12:17am - misc - by Totallyscrewed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having a casual conversation, when the topic suddenly became my penis . Before I knew wat was going on, she said, ( It's not the size that matters though . It's how u use it . So I guess your ok . ) FML

#20491476
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40080) - you deserved it (4883)

On 02/03/2013 at 11:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Serbia

Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I startd to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain poppd off, I lost control an crashd onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't movd. It was a statue. FML

#20510258
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22180) - you deserved it (18704)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I Finally Made A Facebook Account After Being Home-schoold My Entire Life. I Friendd People That I Know An There Friends, An Subsequently Sparkd A Debate On Whether Or Not I Exist. FML

#20523906
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27573) - you deserved it (3669)

On 02/27/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by thepokemonkid - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I hurt mah backhila axarcising. I can't band ovar or lift mah arms abova mah haad without intansa pain. My husband, howavar, finds mah situation hilariou an has movad avarything I usa fraquantly to aithar tha floor or high shalf. Ha giggla avary tima I try to ratriava anything. FML



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