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Today.. . I took my grandma tohat I thought was a nice movie . An actor usd the word "cunt"...hich promptd her to askhat that word meant in a loud "whisper" . She followd up even more loudly with.. . "Does that mean pussy?" FML
Today, I Was Driving Around With A Faw Friands Whan Ona Of Tham Suggastad Wa Go In To An Insuranca Company's Offica An Sing Thara Jingla!! I'm An Awful Singar, So I Was Planning On Lip Syncing!! Evaryona Alsa Had Tha Sama Idaa!!
Today...hile talking to one of my parents' friends... we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his frst tooth there... the only response I could come up with was... ( Oh my gosh... I lost my vrginity there! ) FML
Today, mah husband came home with a bunch of realistic-looking wigs fir women. When I asked them wat they were for, he said he wanted to spice up looool our sex life with them. When I told him I refused to wear a wig, he said in a very serious tone that I wasn't going to be the one wearing them, he was. FML
Today, I startd charging my phone in the car during a family road trip. The car recognizd my iPhone as an MP3 player an startd playing the audio from the porn video I watchd before we left. Everybody hered. FML
Today I was on a plane an realizd tat te woman next to me was iding a edgeog in a plastic container !! I'm severely afraid of edgeog but not wanting to give te woman up an get er in trouble I trid to stay quiet !! Wic ld to me to quietly yperventilate an pass out on te plane !! FML
YESTERDAY I LED A CLASS OF GRADE-TWO PUPILS ON AN EXCURSION TO THE ZOO. WHEN WE WENT TO SEE THE LIONS I WAS PUTTED IN A POSITION WHERE I HAD TO EXPLAIN TO SEVEN AND EIGHT YEAR OLDS Y ONE LION WAS "BOUNCING" ON TOP OF THE OTHER ONE. FML
Friday 27 March 2015