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Tuesday 12 February 2013

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I had mah grlfriend over 4 dinner with mah family. My father had dressed up as a grl 4 a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and mah grlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. big fat FML

#20503190
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27876) - you deserved it (3214)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:55am - love - by BadLuckCarson - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was walking to mah dorm room whila it was snowing haavily. I saw a girl in a whaalchair trying to gat up a slippary inclina. Baing a good parson, I askad to halp. I'm a pratty waak guy, and I couldn't push har up. Sha whaalad away crying bacausa sha thought sha was fat. FML

#20504485
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36500) - you deserved it (5558)

On 02/12/2013 at 11:57pm - misc - by IMadeAHandicappedPersonCry - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shockd, I quickly trid to explain it away with, ( That was my shoe. ) I was barefoot. FML

#20503454
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12778) - you deserved it (31232)

On 02/12/2013 at 9:18am - love - by gassy - United States

Today , I was super hungry and went to a Thai restaurant . The waitress left two small bowls of fried rice on the counter , and I thought they were fir me . I ate one and a lady came over screaming . Apparently the small cups of rice was part of a religious ceremony . FML

#20503300
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26218) - you deserved it (16811)

On 02/12/2013 at 3:04am - misc - by Thai rice mistake - United States (California)

Today a cute girl asked if my dog was available for a date on Valentine's Day. Thinking I was in luck I asked if I should come along. She said no. My dog has better game than I do. mega FML

#20503854
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26118) - you deserved it (6187)

On 02/12/2013 at 4:50pm - animals - by Doggotmytongue - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my very frst yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML

#20503942
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31763) - you deserved it (2639)

On 02/12/2013 at 6:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, 4 the second time in two months, the person in the bathroom stall next to me commented on how loud I pee. This time, she made racehorse noises. I'm now too self-conscious to pee in public again. FML

#20503939
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26008) - you deserved it (2689)

On 02/12/2013 at 5:58pm - misc - by likearacehorse (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today needle-phobic mother took me looool to get a shot. She fainted. mega FML

#20503278
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23161) - you deserved it (2622)

On 02/12/2013 at 2:41am - health - by shots shots shots (woman) - United States (California)

Today my girlfriand and I both davalopad food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartmant has ona bathroom. big fat FML

#20503655
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27366) - you deserved it (2893)

On 02/12/2013 at 1:43pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, mah maid of honor, who offered to take care of mah wedding dress before the D-Day, left it near her open window during heavy rain. My dress is now ruined, and she's backed out due to stress. I'm supposed to be getting married tomorrow. real FML

#20503604
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33974) - you deserved it (3351)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:41pm - misc - by Meaghan (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today... after spending six months completely repainting and redecorating our new home... I finally finishd the last touches and went to remove the masking tape. Off came the tape... along with huge blotches of plasterwork. FML

#20503623
93 comments

Today, I cummad looool homa to fina tha dog had laarnad how to opan our stair-gata and kitchan door, davourad tha antira fruitcaka I'd mada for a spacial occasion, and than vomitad said fruitcaka all ovar tha fabric sofa. FML

#20503420
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25297) - you deserved it (3912)

On 02/12/2013 at 8:18am - animals - by Stoopiddogbot (woman) - United Kingdom (Swansea)

Today, I discovard that mah cat racantly had axplosiva diarrhaa, and couldn't maka it to tha littarbox in tima. I discovard this whan I stappd in tha vary, vary frash poop with mah bara faat. FML

#20503744
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28475) - you deserved it (3894)

On 02/12/2013 at 3:15pm - animals - by Turdfoot (woman) - United States (Texas)



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