Monday 25 February 2013 
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Today, my friends confronted me and told me that they no longer want to visit my house because my dog smells really disgusting. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the smell is actually my parents, who have been trying to "save water" by only showering once a fortnight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26240) - you deserved it (2325)
On 02/28/2013 at 5:56am - misc - by sickofthesmelltoo (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I saw my car being broken into on the street below my apartment. Too scared to stop them myself, I called the police. Before I could even tell them what was going on, they put me on hold. It was a good 5 minutes before I realized they'd hung up on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22570) - you deserved it (2300)
On 02/27/2013 at 7:42pm - misc - by forgotten - United States (Arizona)
Today, I told my mom that I heard something, and I think we have rats in the attic and should hire an exterminator. She looked at me and said, "Rats, huh? That's what the mom in The Exorcist thought, but it turned out to be the devil living up there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25324) - you deserved it (2072)
On 03/02/2013 at 11:18pm - misc - by jkbeynon - United States (California)
Today, I locked my keys in my truck. The good news is that I have a spare set in my house. The bad news is that my house key is on the same keyring as my locked-in truck key. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20381) - you deserved it (6614)
On 02/25/2013 at 5:30pm - misc - by burning balls of fuck this - United States (Virginia)
Today, while at the nail salon, my boyfriend called. Since I was getting my nails done, I had to put him on speaker. The whole salon heard him break up with me. I can still hear their snickering in my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26180) - you deserved it (5149)
On 02/25/2013 at 6:04pm - love - by HeatherRosure18 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I came home to find that while my husband and children were mindlessly watching TV, one of our dogs got into the cupboard that stores the deep fryer. He got the lid off, ate all of the old oil and barfed everything up on the couch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21888) - you deserved it (2788)
On 02/25/2013 at 2:25am - animals - by Sammy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at my friend's house, when she commented that her dog's fur kept getting tangled because of its length. I reached over to tickle his tummy, felt a big tangled knot and agreed that he needed a good grooming. Then I realized what I'd grabbed wasn't fur. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20117) - you deserved it (6445)
On 02/26/2013 at 1:09pm - animals - by Puppylove (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22914) - you deserved it (1912)
On 02/27/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by Chelsea - United States (Ohio)
Today, I texted my boyfriend a cute picture that I drew for him, with a little note saying "love you." He replied by sending me a picture of a nose hair he'd plucked, along with the caption, "longest one yet." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21709) - you deserved it (2760)
On 03/01/2013 at 12:21am - love - by thenewgirl29 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after months of my doctor telling me that my heart palpitations are simply due to anxiety, and that I'm perfectly healthy, I decided to weight train to face my fears. Two hours later, I was in the emergency room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20910) - you deserved it (1750)
On 03/01/2013 at 10:17pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)
Today, while I was studying for an exam, my younger sister came home extremely drunk and threw up all over herself and her bed. I later got grounded for not setting a better example. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26289) - you deserved it (1424)
On 02/28/2013 at 6:02am - misc - by catdog552 - United States
Today, I was at my class's band concert. Before the curtain was raised, I helped haul the piano to a different spot so a girl who would've had to stand behind it could be seen. I said, "There, now your mom can see you play!" She responded with, "My mom's blind." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27949) - you deserved it (2622)
On 03/02/2013 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I fell down a flight of stairs at college. I was taken to hospital with a fractured ankle and had to call my parents to drive me home. They constantly made passive-aggressive remarks on the way home, because I'd "totally ruined" their plans to eat out at a fancy restaurant tonight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22235) - you deserved it (2264)
On 02/28/2013 at 5:33pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Ards)
Monday 20 May 2013
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