Saturday 16 February 2013 
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Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25799) - you deserved it (1370)
On 02/21/2013 at 1:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, a colleague gave me an expensive box of chocolates for my birthday. I was surprised she spent so much on me, but didn't think much of it. Only when I got back home and excitedly opened the box did I realise the chocolates had expired months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21244) - you deserved it (1828)
On 02/23/2013 at 8:42pm - work - by Migole (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, while at the store with my mom, we ran into the girl I recently confessed to being interested in. My mom decided to shout, "IS THAT HER?! IS THAT THE GIRL YOU LIKE?!" Embarrassed, I desperately told her to be quiet. She grounded me for being "rude" to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27597) - you deserved it (2101)
On 02/15/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)
Today, I had to convince my dad that text lingo causes brain damage just to try to get him to stop. He actually believed me, and is telling everyone they have, or will receive brain damage soon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9167) - you deserved it (21839)
On 02/13/2013 at 11:45am - misc - by oh my dad - United States (Kentucky)
Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center, I accidentally let one rip which echoed through the meditation chamber. If that wasn't bad enough, the follow-up odor was enough to fell a charging rhinoceros. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19648) - you deserved it (5180)
On 02/22/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was walking to my dorm room while it was snowing heavily. I saw a girl in a wheelchair trying to get up a slippery incline. Being a good person, I asked to help. I'm a pretty weak guy, and I couldn't push her up. She wheeled away crying because she thought she was fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30405) - you deserved it (4846)
On 02/12/2013 at 11:57pm - misc - by IMadeAHandicappedPersonCry - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my high-strung and normally very proper mother took twice her prescribed dose of Ambien, and extolled the virtues of a "full blown sexual relationship with oneself", advising my teenage sister to "only include the men when they behave." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22368) - you deserved it (1742)
On 02/18/2013 at 3:24am - intimacy - by buxton1 - United States (California)
Today, a cute girl asked if my dog was available for a date on Valentine's Day. Thinking I was in luck, I asked if I should come along. She said no. My dog has better game than I do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (292) - you deserved it (1811)
On 02/12/2013 at 4:50pm - animals - by Doggotmytongue - United States (Illinois)
Today, my mum got the idea of switching to a different dishwashing detergent. The new one is so strong that it coats all the dishes in a nauseating perfume-like smell. It's so pungent that it gets absorbed into everything we eat or drink. She's determined to use up the entire bottle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20297) - you deserved it (1612)
On 02/15/2013 at 1:50pm - health - by selena5112 (woman) - Norway (Troms)
Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML
I agree, your life sucks (27683) - you deserved it (3130)
On 02/20/2013 at 7:01am - kids - by Laila - United States
Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24877) - you deserved it (2097)
On 02/23/2013 at 1:28am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, working as a waitress, I was asked by a customer, yet again, how my baby was doing. I don't have a baby, but I do look very similar to my 25-year-old coworker, who's a new mom. People confuse us all the time. Unfortunately, my crush, who was standing nearby, doesn't know that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23083) - you deserved it (1910)
On 02/13/2013 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage". When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21893) - you deserved it (2987)
On 02/16/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by howannoying - Australia (Victoria)
Monday 17 June 2013
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