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Saturday 2 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I Was Telling My Boyfriend How Proud I Am Of Him Fir Finding A Really Good Job. He Interrupted Me To Tell Me That My Breath Smelled Like His Cat's. Mega FML

#20484067
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21939) - you deserved it (7975)

On 01/28/2013 at 11:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

yesterday I finally found the courage to ask a guy I lyk out fir a drink. He accepted, we drank, an when it cummed time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him dad's number instead. FML

#20489080
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11557) - you deserved it (29986)

On 02/01/2013 at 2:59pm - love - by 3some? uh, no (woman) - Dominican Republic

Today, I spun off te road and into a ditc!! Te insurance company told me I'd ave to wait an our, as tey ad oter cars to tow frst!! I ad to pee so badly tat I resorted to using te only ting I ad in my car: a plastic bag!! Tat's wen I got a knock on my window from te tow truck driver!! mega FML

#20489830
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25844) - you deserved it (5419)

On 02/02/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by merp. (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I trippd while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reachd out and grabbd onto one of the guys walking up. I endd up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgustd glares as I dustd myself off. FML

#20489268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22697) - you deserved it (7136)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today after three weeks of holding out my stingy boss finally calld animal control about the brds in the air vent above the register!! While I was working they rummagd through the vents causing live maggot to fall down right in front of me!! FML

#20497093
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29358) - you deserved it (2237)

On 02/07/2013 at 2:44pm - animals - by shaviTuT (woman) - Malaysia (Johor)

TODAY, I WAS GIVEN A WEDGIE BY A COMPLETE STRANGER IN A CROWDED BAR. FAT FML

#20492051
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26292) - you deserved it (2802)

On 02/03/2013 at 8:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today... I was moving into my new looool apartment. Te previous owner ad refusd to move out until today... anden I got tere... I realizd I didn't ave a key. I was about to call imen I found out I didn't ned to; e took te door. big fat FML

#20486186
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28561) - you deserved it (1940)

On 01/30/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by jeoak - India

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow!! He's 22!! FML

#20494713
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22593) - you deserved it (8201)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

TODAY, I CUMMED HOME FROM A TWO-WEEK VACATION. WHEN I WALKED INTO MY HOUSE, I FOUND CAT POOP EVERYWHERE. IT TOOK ME SEVERAL HOURS TO CLEAN IT ALL UP, AND THE HOUSE STILL SMELLS TERRIBLE. THE WORST PART IS THAT I'VE NEVER OWNED A CAT IN MY LIFE. REAL FML

#20500118
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34556) - you deserved it (2135)

On 02/09/2013 at 8:39pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, mah pants rippd while I was at work. I had to keep mah balls to the wall while I dodgd customers and edgd ever closer to the break room. Before I could call mah wife and ask her to bring a new pair, mah boss burst in, got pissd, and made me go back out and deal with rate customers. FML

#20487736
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25195) - you deserved it (2053)

On 01/31/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by fuckit (man) - Italy (Lazio)

Taday I woke up to a voice-mail from ma manager saying I ad te day off!! Excitd, I made plans wit ma friends!! A few minutes ago I got a call from ma oter manager yelling at me for not sowing up, and te original manager reveald e ad me confusd wit anoter girl!! real FML

#20491470
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29519) - you deserved it (1833)

On 02/03/2013 at 11:22am - work - by TheBaconater - United States (Wisconsin)

TODAY, I WAS REHEARSING 4 A SCHOOL PLAY. MY DRAMA TEACHER KEEPS CRITICISING THE PART WHERE I FAKE-TRIP, SAYING I MAKE IT LOOK TERRIBLY FAKE. DURING TODAY'S REHEARSAL, I ACTUALLY TRIPPED 4 REAL, AND SMASHED KNEECAPS AGAINST THE FLOOR WITH A SCREAM. HE STILL SAID "ACTING" SUCKED. FML

#20498655
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29390) - you deserved it (2493)

On 02/08/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today I spent most of mah daughter's 8th brthday with her in the hospital while her broken arm was putted in a cast. Apparently mah son had told her that some people gained the ability to fly on there 8th brthday before encouraging her to fine out by jumping off the slippery slide. mega FML

#20486554
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24402) - you deserved it (2083)

On 01/30/2013 at 5:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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