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Wednesday 16 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was babysitting, and a little girl asked for help with her homework. I cheerfully began an explanation, only to freeze mid-sentence. I could not for the life of me remember how to do long-division. I'm about to graduate from Cornell University, and her little brother had to correct me. FML

#20459773
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31507) - you deserved it (9554)

On 01/14/2013 at 9:52pm - kids - by IvyLeague? - United States (New York)

Today, after working the midnight shift at my job, I thought it would be nice to leave a sweet love note along with my boyfriend's favourite candy in his car. Upon finding it, he immediately broke up with me for "breaking into" his car. FML

#20460414
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32409) - you deserved it (4937)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:14am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while video chatting with my girlfriend, who lives on the other side of the country, I thought I'd play a song for her on my guitar. The string broke and hit me in the face. I burst into tears and had to hang up. FML

#20471171
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32959) - you deserved it (7569)

On 01/21/2013 at 12:04pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I dragged my boyfriend to see Les Misérables with me. He now refuses to communicate with me through any medium other than singing. Apparently, this is his revenge. FML

#20471580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16147) - you deserved it (46502)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:39pm - love - by lesson.learned (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML

#20461359
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31588) - you deserved it (2808)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by veggieluver (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, the lead singer of the band I recently joined blatantly admitted to a fan that the only reason he let me in was because I'm "so fuckin' ugly" that I make the rest of them look "ten times better" in comparison. FML

#20464662
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30674) - you deserved it (2629)

On 01/17/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by sad drummer (man) - United States (California)

Today, I made my first snowman ever, and then cried when my big brother kicked it to pieces. I'm 27. FML

#20475358
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30752) - you deserved it (9471)

On 01/23/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML

#20471562
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29124) - you deserved it (3379)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was talking to my grandma and I mentioned the fact that tomatoes are technically fruit. It's been an hour and she's still yelling, accusing me of lying to her. FML

#20473723
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26491) - you deserved it (4281)

On 01/22/2013 at 8:35pm - misc - by I should have kept my mouth shut - United States (California)

Today, I found my boyfriend's Facebook page. I also found his wife's. FML

#20475642
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44098) - you deserved it (4984)

On 01/23/2013 at 9:59pm - love - by ohokay (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, after months of searching and several emotional breakdowns, I finally found a new job. My wife's words of encouragement? "Try not to fuck this one up." FML

#20464089
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28658) - you deserved it (8803)

On 01/17/2013 at 5:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML

#20465228
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15038) - you deserved it (32710)

On 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm - kids - by walkingdictionary - Canada (Ontario)



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