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Sunday 9 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

today I was slapped acros the face by a grl in the waiting room at the dentist's office!! She thought I was taking a picture of her breast with mah phone!! I was smilinghile reading other people's FMLs!! FML

#20189568
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39022) - you deserved it (3170)

On 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by karmamaybe - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time!! I went slowly to build up the excitement, an I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." an told me to stop embarrassing him!! FML

#20399775
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34207) - you deserved it (8360)

On 12/14/2012 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by sucks at sucking (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)

Today, I finally got ma wedding potos in te mail. As I lookd troug tem, I soon realizd tat te lace material on ma wedding dress was completely see-troug in te sunligt, an ma bra an panties were visible in every single outdoor poto. I ad an outdoor wedding. FML

#20397769
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27779) - you deserved it (8004)

On 12/13/2012 at 9:35am - misc - by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my usband and I sat our 10-year-old daugter down fir a cat over er recent cursing. Wen my usband askd were se'd eard te words, se "innocently" replid, "from mommy's oter boyfriend." He took er seriously, accusd me of ceating, and asn't been ome since. FML

#20399736
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33718) - you deserved it (6144)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:52pm - love - by mandybar15 (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today I Found Out Mah New Girlfriend Is A Screamer. This Would Normally Turn Me On Except She Sounds Like She's Bieng Murdered With A Rusty Fork. Mega FML

#20193609
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34819) - you deserved it (4003)

On 12/06/2012 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Dontwaketheneighbors (man) - United States (California)

TODAY, AT A CHRISTMA PARTY, MY CRUSH CAME UP TO ME AND CUTELY POINTED OUT THAT I WAS STANDING UNDER MISTLETOE. THE ONLY RESPONSE MY STUPID BRAIN COULD THINK OF WAS, "PROBABLY FULL OF NARGLE THOUGH." HE GAVE ME A CONFUSED LOOK AND WALKED AWAY. MEGA FML

#20402533
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27319) - you deserved it (12895)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today my friend and I told each other about our boyfriends. They're both nice kind beautiful talented funny sweet and smart. They also both have the same name. And house. And job. And car. FML

#20196037
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41820) - you deserved it (2775)

On 12/08/2012 at 5:44am - love - by ouch. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

yesterday my boyfriend an I had a disagreement over the pronunciation of the word "train." It turned into a heated debate that lasted all night an ended with us sleeping in separate rooms.

Today, I spant naarly half an hour trying to dispal my sistar's baliaf that man hava to strap down thair panisas bafora going jogging. fat FML

#20402473
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29715) - you deserved it (3640)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Waterford)

TODAY , MAH ROOMMATE TURNED THE THERMOSTAT DOWN TO 50 DEGREES . WHY? BECAUSE SHE READ THAT SHIVERING BURNS CALORIES . FML

#20200383
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23024) - you deserved it (1807)

On 12/11/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I made a positive remark to the owner of local groceries store 4 employing a special needs girl. Not only is the girl not mentally handicappd, she's also the owner's daughter. FML

#20190915
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10929) - you deserved it (29086)

On 12/04/2012 at 1:51pm - misc - by Vassy (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, at tha gas station, tha automatic door didn't opan whan I approachad it!! I askad tha cashiar to opan it for ma, joking that cuz I'm a radhaad, I didn't hava a soul and it wouldn't opan for ma!! Tha cashiar fraakad and wouldn't lat ma go until I provad I had a soul!! FML

#20199980
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25810) - you deserved it (5180)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

I WAS VISITING MA DAUGTER,OSE USBAND WAS STILL ASLEEP AT NOON!! I MADE A POINT OF STOMPING AROUND ON TE ARDWOOD FLOOR AND SPEAKING LOUDLY TO WAKE IS LAZY ASS UP!! TURNS OUT E'S NOW WORKING A 14-OUR GRAVEYARD SIFT, AND IT AS NO NEGATIVE EFFECT ON IS SOE-TROWING SKILLS!! FML

#20193830
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5504) - you deserved it (76153)

On 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm - misc - by mom (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)



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