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Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I accidentally left my textbook at home. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but today was my class final. Since it was an open-book final, I'd decided not to study for it. I'm pretty sure I failed. FML

#20201964
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9374) - you deserved it (35617)

On 12/12/2012 at 2:14pm - misc - by dumbassgrad - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

#20189885
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23520) - you deserved it (3185)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States

Today, it's my sixth day taking care of my family's seven animals while my parents are in Singapore. So far, I've emergency-called the vet twice, taken a dog to the vet once, and cleaned up liquid dog shit five times. FML

#20197436
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24145) - you deserved it (2631)

On 12/09/2012 at 8:18am - animals - by KennyDidIt - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was yelled at by a customer, who was upset over having waited twenty minutes for a waiter to come take her order. Maybe it would be understandable, if she was sitting in an actual restaurant, and not a serve-yourself coffee house. FML

#20194179
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24220) - you deserved it (1421)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to see a musical that some school friends had put on. At some point in the show, the main character kicked her leg up in the air, and her high heel flew off of her foot and into the audience. The shoe hit me square in the face. FML

#20196764
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25541) - you deserved it (1958)

On 12/08/2012 at 7:25pm - health - by ko - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got punched in the face after a stranger asked for a light, didn't realize it was a butane lighter and burnt the tip of his nose lighting his cigarette. Now my nose looks worse than his. FML

#20193519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19418) - you deserved it (3084)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:30am - misc - by chinousmc - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that storing a partially empty bowl of ice cream in the freezer overnight along with the spoon, and then trying to take a bite the next day, can have the same effect as sticking your tongue on a flagpole in the middle of winter. FML

#20195063
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6760) - you deserved it (28970)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by Moose (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I have a cold. I can't begin to count how many times I've sneezed throughout the day, but I can count how many times I've sneezed so hard that I've peed myself: twice. Once while I was at work helping a customer, the other while sitting on the couch next to my boyfriend. FML

#20397583
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24390) - you deserved it (2323)

On 12/13/2012 at 3:58am - health - by meranda_johnson - United States

Today, after coming home from surgery, I discovered that the heating in my entire building had failed. I called my mom asking if I could come and stay with her for a few days. She told me to "think warm thoughts." FML

#20192758
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24719) - you deserved it (1623)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27pm - money - by lonelyandcold (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, in art class, our instructor called me up to the front to model for a drawing. I agreed to pose because it was nice to be called on, and I needed a self-esteem boost. He then thanked me, saying it's a great exercise for the class to draw such strange proportions. FML

#20202076
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25049) - you deserved it (2127)

On 12/12/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my mother told my therapist that I've been reverting to childlike behavior and she was worried about my maturity. She was worried because I screamed hysterically after dropping a pot of boiling noodles on my lap. FML

#20397574
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26783) - you deserved it (1750)

On 12/13/2012 at 3:31am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend was dropping me off home and we were still in the car. When I went in to give him a hug, my hand hit his shoulder and I dropped my phone at his feet. Just as I pulled back up with it, my dad was staring at us from outside. He still appears to think I was giving him head. FML

#20200049
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37776) - you deserved it (3909)

On 12/11/2012 at 2:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while picking up a birthday cake, I was screamed at by an upset woman for getting special attention from the bakers, and that I was nothing more than an attention-hogging slut. The bakers are my co-workers and I was picking my cake up on my day off. FML

#20201761
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24084) - you deserved it (1600)

On 12/12/2012 at 10:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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