Wednesday 23 May 2012 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I replaced my car's windscreen wipers, after someone stole the last pair. After I finished, I went indoors for a drink. When I returned, the new ones had been stolen too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16151) - you deserved it (1169)
On 05/25/2012 at 1:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, I was shopping with a friend. We snuck into the same fitting room so we could give our opinions on each other's clothes. The suspicious saleswoman knocked on the door and asked how many people were in our room. I quickly answered, "It's OK. She's just watching." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11061) - you deserved it (4839)
On 05/23/2012 at 6:50pm - misc - by Shopper (woman) - United States
Today, I found out that the person who has been stalking me has also been stalking someone else. I got upset. It seems it took being stalked to make me feel good about myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8415) - you deserved it (10487)
On 05/28/2012 at 2:24am - love - by stalked (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, it's been three weeks since I started using a hair-growth shampoo in the hopes of combating my balding. All it's done so far is make the hair I do have monstrously bushy, both upstairs and down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12627) - you deserved it (2772)
On 05/21/2012 at 6:47pm - health - by bear - Norway (Nordland)
Today, I was driving home, when some kid on a motorbike shot in front of me from the pavement, almost running me off the road. When I confronted him, he screamed, "Watch where you're going next time!" If I could flush every last one of these human turds from the toilet of life, I would. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12549) - you deserved it (2030)
On 05/29/2012 at 1:10pm - misc - by cunting cunts (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)
Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19113) - you deserved it (1037)
On 05/29/2012 at 9:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)
Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3522) - you deserved it (19744)
On 05/25/2012 at 2:29am - misc - by Karate Kid (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I saw a psychiatrist for the first time. He asked me what had brought me there, so I said I needed to get over some issues. He told me to close my eyes and visualize myself constructing a bridge. I paid to get told to build a bridge in my mind's eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11000) - you deserved it (2923)
On 05/22/2012 at 7:54pm - health - by fml - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I admitted to my parents that I have an eating disorder. Instead of trying to help, my mom stared at me and said, "Duh". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16070) - you deserved it (2775)
On 05/28/2012 at 9:38pm - misc - by Hungrey - United States
Today, I found out that my little brother has been rubbing my toothbrush in dog shit for the last month because I accidentally broke one of his toys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19347) - you deserved it (2871)
On 05/22/2012 at 9:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had dinner with my family for the first time in a couple of days. My mum and dad spent the majority of the time arguing whether salt or pepper weighed more. This is why I'm not home often. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12095) - you deserved it (1258)
On 05/23/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went to see a once-in-a-lifetime moment when the Olympic torch passed through my town. I waited for 3 hours only to get a bruise from a man shoving me out of the way at the exact moment it went past. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17034) - you deserved it (1489)
On 05/23/2012 at 11:53am - misc - by Notorch (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, I told my mom I was going out to hang out with some friends. She looked me dead in the eye and said, "Don't lie to me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16424) - you deserved it (1535)
On 05/27/2012 at 4:00am - misc - by cloudberry - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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