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February 2013

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Today my girlfriand and I both davalopad food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartmant has ona bathroom. big fat FML

#20503655
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27365) - you deserved it (2893)

On 02/12/2013 at 1:43pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

TODAY... MY VERY CONSERVATIVE MOM MET MY GRLFRIEND... WHO RECENTLY SHAVD HER HEAD IN SUPPORT OF HER BEST FRIEND... WHO HAS CANCER. MY GRLFRIEND LOOKS BEAUTIFUL AND FEMININE EVEN WITH HER STILL VERY SHORT HAIR. MY MOM... HOWEVER... KEEPS INSISTING THAT I'M DATING "A CONFUSD TRANSGENDER". FML

#20519321
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35668) - you deserved it (2333)

On 02/23/2013 at 8:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a classmate postd a recording of a recent lecture on mah university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some grl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. mega FML

#20524519
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33749) - you deserved it (3896)

On 02/27/2013 at 3:52pm - misc - by DumbCuntApparently (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, boss told me to go outside and take part in te company's stupid Harlem Sake video. Wen I declined, e treatened to fre me if I didn't take part. I ended up bieng te guy wo ad to furiously pelvic trust before te music dropped. FML

#20518411
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36296) - you deserved it (6156)

On 02/23/2013 at 2:32am - work - by mypelvishurts - United States (California)

Today, I had my gallbladder removed. I have a very painful incision in my belly that makes any kind of movement excruciating. I've had the hiccup 5 times so far. big fat FML

Today.. . I went to the doctor to get a blood test and I startd cryinghen I saw the needle . I plannd on becoming a doctor . FML

#20519825
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24388) - you deserved it (12212)

On 02/24/2013 at 4:34am - health - by Caroline - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, A State Trooper Ticketed Me After Learning I Was Ticketed For The Same Offense An Hour Earlier, Namely Driving With A Broken Headlight. The Good News Is That Both Tickets Will Be Dismissed If I Go To Court. The Bad News Is That I'd Have To Go To Different Courthouses At The Same Time Of Day. FML

#20494464
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28817) - you deserved it (3741)

On 02/05/2013 at 1:59pm - money - by halfmypaycheckgone (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I hred out a motel room so I could stay there by myself and lie to mah mother and grandmother about having friends. This is the thrd time. FML

#20492687
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30860) - you deserved it (13850)

On 02/04/2013 at 2:45am - love - by lonelyloser - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, After Heavy Rain Mah Street Flooded. While In Mah Living Room, I Looked Outside To See That Mah Elderly Neighbour Was Outside Splashing In A Knee Deep Puddle. He Was Butt-naked And Wearing A Snorkel And Flippers. FML

#20492744
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27774) - you deserved it (3206)

On 02/04/2013 at 4:15am - misc - by Stunned (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my wife mentiond tat se wantd to give me a tree-way. I was ecstatic, until se opend er rigt and, only to reveal a 3-way ligtbulb. FML

#20512105
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16359) - you deserved it (38607)

On 02/18/2013 at 12:23pm - intimacy - by phatdaddy62 (man) - United States

Today, I downloadd a movie that I already own on DVD, because I was feeling too lazy to get up an fetch it from the living room . I think I've hit rock bottom . FML

#20516729
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10113) - you deserved it (45150) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/21/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by lolo - Israel (HaDarom)

Today, a guy I went on one date wit asked me out again via text. Being onest, I texted back, politely saying tat e was a good guy but I wasn't really interested. He cummed over to ouse, screaming about ow awful I was fir "text message breaking up wit im" an ten cracked windsield. FML

#20522936
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35945) - you deserved it (4219)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:43am - love - by fuckedover - United States

Today, my boyfriend gave me the most beautiful diamond ring I have ever seen!! As I excitedly putted it on my finger, he told me it wasn't an engagement ring, but I should wear it lyk one to keep other men away and seem "unapproachable"!! FML

#20488292
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31724) - you deserved it (4108)

On 01/31/2013 at 10:35pm - love - by whatsername92 (woman) - United States



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