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January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flrting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the grl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in yur case, it's a big no." fat FML

#20470654
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20530) - you deserved it (41085)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:32am - love - by black and yellow - United States (California)

Today , mah son sprayed Axe body-spray all over the house in the vain hope of covering up the scent of the joints he'd been smoking!! fat FML

#20446338
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29835) - you deserved it (4738)

On 01/07/2013 at 3:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today , I realizd my girlfriend makes the same exact noise in bd and when she eats!! I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover!! mega FML

#20444730
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27800) - you deserved it (3538)

On 01/06/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Yesterday, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with mah boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants cummd off. He then lookd at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

#20460703
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43734) - you deserved it (6010)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

2day I found out that I was pragnant an sant a pictura of tha positiva tast to mah boyfriand. Bafora I got a taxt back from him, I got his nawly updatd Facabook status that raad "This has got to ba tha most daprassing day of mah lifa." raal FML

#20444550
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22712) - you deserved it (6684)

On 01/06/2013 at 3:17am - misc - by kiken.bara - United States

today I told ma boyfriend about ma upcoming mout surgery. He freakd out. Not cuz e's worrid about me but cuz I told im I will not be able to give im ead for two weeks. mega FML

Today... mah nieghbor went on vacation... leaving me in charge of his cat an dog. For some reason... he calls his dog ( Cat ) an his cat ( Dog ). There r two pet food containers... one labeld ( Cat ) an the other labeld ( Dog ). I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

#20437796
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37960) - you deserved it (4018)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:07am - animals - by catdog - United States (California)

Today, my wife and I had a fight,hich I thought we resolved!! Later,hile painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about!! She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all!! FML

#20436663
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41995) - you deserved it (5924)

On 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, as part of a charity project called Operation Valentine, I worked with 150 other volunteers to make care packages and Valentine's Day cards to send to the troops in Afghanistan, thanking them 4 there courage. My boyfriend called the cards "cheating" and now refuses to see me. FML

#20460276
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38363) - you deserved it (3701)

On 01/15/2013 at 2:23am - love - by helpme (woman) - United States (California)

Taday mah mom had the option of choosing anywhere in the worldhere we could go on vacation. We live in the USA and she chose to fly to Texas, rent an RV, and drive to Florida. Anywhere in the world. FML

#20482339
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32409) - you deserved it (2869)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:48pm - misc - by j_Lauren (woman) - United States

Today, Mah 8-year-old Sister Matter-of-factly Said That She's Going To Get Married Before Me If I Don't Stop Wearing Track Pants. FML

#20462592
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14953) - you deserved it (27350)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:28pm - misc - by Kendra_Nine (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today , I got frd from mah job because I "look too grumpy." FML

#20437963
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28913) - you deserved it (9388)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I've been struggling with English paper for the past hour, because I can't concentrate . This is because mom is in the room next to me, singing to her pet rat about wat a cute little boy he is, in between yelling at him to stop "molesting" her . FML

#20452365
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31802) - you deserved it (2642)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:02pm - animals - by theycallmekitty (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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