Today, I was at my boyfriend's house when I got a call from my parents. They told me to come home immediately. Panicking, I rushed home. My dad pulled out a clear tube filled with dried leaves. They accused me of having marijuana. It was catnip for my kitten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17261) - you deserved it (1061)
On 12/01/2012 at 9:01pm - misc - by potheadloljk (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16078) - you deserved it (1240)
On 12/03/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by reedcarter -
Today, after coming home from surgery, I discovered that the heating in my entire building had failed. I called my mom asking if I could come and stay with her for a few days. She told me to "think warm thoughts." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15973) - you deserved it (870)
On 12/05/2012 at 6:27pm - money - by lonelyandcold (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)
Today, my family went on a family trip without me. Their reason for not bringing me? My older sister wanted extra legroom during the drive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22094) - you deserved it (1270)
On 12/10/2012 at 2:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, it's my sixth day taking care of my family's seven animals while my parents are in Singapore. So far, I've emergency-called the vet twice, taken a dog to the vet once, and cleaned up liquid dog shit five times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16573) - you deserved it (1939)
On 12/09/2012 at 8:18am - animals - by KennyDidIt - United States (Alabama)
Today, I woke up thinking my house was on fire because I could hear crackling flames downstairs. I panicked and tripped out of bed. It was the fireplace channel I left on last night so I could wake up to a Christmas ambiance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8311) - you deserved it (22277)
On 12/25/2012 at 9:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boss put me on suspension, a week after granting a subordinate time off to recover from surgery. When I signed the paperwork, I was too embarrassed to admit I didn't understand her writing, which apparently said she was getting treated for "dangerously low levels of dick". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7570) - you deserved it (17063)
On 12/31/2012 at 5:42pm - work - by offtothejobcentre (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I went to see a musical that some school friends had put on. At some point in the show, the main character kicked her leg up in the air, and her high heel flew off of her foot and into the audience. The shoe hit me square in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16985) - you deserved it (1123)
On 12/08/2012 at 7:25pm - health - by ko - United States (Illinois)
Today, after several years spent hung up on my ex, I was finally moving on. I was on a date with my new boyfriend when my ex walked past us. He broke down crying, got on his knees, and begged me to come back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26452) - you deserved it (2505)
On 12/16/2012 at 6:57pm - love - by Miki (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15182) - you deserved it (2026)
On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States
Today, I was texting my mother after my boyfriend broke off our relationship. She offered incredibly supportive replies such as "No, really?" and "Aww, that sucks." before apparently getting bored and claiming she had to go because her "text reception" was breaking up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19980) - you deserved it (3024)
On 12/27/2012 at 6:20pm - love - by youfuckingdumbassmum (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, my mom and I went to Best Buy for some Christmas shopping. She picked up some presents for me and told me not to look at what she was buying. When we got to the register, she didn't have enough money, and I ended up having to buy my own presents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28269) - you deserved it (2037)
On 12/22/2012 at 3:25pm - money - by dude, where's my balls? :( (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, to scare my little brother I dressed up as the killer from the Scream movies. The outfit was a little too long on me, and I ended up falling down the stairs. Not only was he doubled over laughing, but so were the people in the emergency room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6136) - you deserved it (19439)
On 12/01/2012 at 3:21pm - health - by fieldmarshalclitter (man) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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