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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my cat played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

#20126149
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22002) - you deserved it (5828)

On 10/21/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found a notebook my 12-year-old sister had been doodling in. Turns out the "doodles" were poems full of obscenities and descriptions of how she wanted to hurt herself. When I showed it to my mom, she accused me of writing the notebook myself to frame my sister. FML

#20133698
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27479) - you deserved it (2190)

On 10/26/2012 at 12:38am - kids - by familyofpsychos - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my boyfriend went to ask my dad for my hand in marriage. All I could make out from the door was mumbling, until profanities started flying. My boyfriend shouted "well she's a SINGLE bitch now!" and stormed out of the house. My dad still refuses to tell me what happened in there. FML

#20131535
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35571) - you deserved it (2232)

On 10/24/2012 at 5:08pm - love - by wtactualfuck :( (woman) - United States

Today, someone stole the massive pumpkin I've been painstakingly growing all year. What did they do with it? They put it in the middle of a busy intersection. FML

#20098412
122 comments

Today, I was watching TV with my mom, when a plumbing ad came on. A hot guy showed up on-screen and said "I'm here to snake your drain." My mom immediately piped up with, "Oh, I'd let him snake my drain any day." Thanks for that imagery, mom. FML

#20101823
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23904) - you deserved it (3015)

On 10/04/2012 at 7:24pm - misc - by disgusted (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by showing up at my work and proposing to me. It was sweet until an angry customer bitched us out for "wasting her time." FML

#20141262
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28312) - you deserved it (3393)

On 10/31/2012 at 2:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after confronting my boyfriend about cheating on me, he confessed to everything. I was caught off guard by his honesty, but not nearly as caught off guard as I was when he eagerly questioned me on when our breakup sex will be. FML

#20113249
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33147) - you deserved it (3006)

On 10/12/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by You're NOT getting lucky today hun (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my landlord informed me that from now on, she'd prefer if I paid my rent in cash each month. Apparently, I "look sketchy" and she didn't "ever want to deal with the hassle of a bounced check." FML

#20102772
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21900) - you deserved it (2159)

On 10/05/2012 at 10:56am - money - by sketchball (man) - United States

Today, I went to a big family dinner. I didn't realize I hadn't been invited until we were about to sit down to eat. There were 12 chairs, 12 plates, 12 forks, and 12 glasses. I was the 13th person to arrive. FML

#20141489
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25966) - you deserved it (2495)

On 10/31/2012 at 10:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my mom gives my brother tips on how to hurt my feelings the most. FML

#20107287
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32516) - you deserved it (2144)

On 10/08/2012 at 11:08am - misc - by LovedByFamily (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML

#20127937
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26206) - you deserved it (1816)

On 10/22/2012 at 5:01am - love - by reserved - United States (California)

Today, as I was rushing to get out for work, I opened my door just in time to witness a large snake slither into my home. I had no choice but to lock it inside and go to work. I've now spent several hours searching for it with my friends, and we can't find it. I'm scared to go to sleep. FML

#20114536
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27225) - you deserved it (6086)

On 10/13/2012 at 2:35am - animals - by afraidtosleep - United States (Texas)

Today, on the first cold night of autumn, I realized I need a girlfriend because the only way I can stay warm is if I spoon with my dog. FML

#20127903
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19930) - you deserved it (4853)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by sadguyme (man) - United States (California)



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