Today, I bought some bitter-apple spray to stop my puppy chewing on everything. Later, I found out how effective it was, when I tried to eat a sandwich, and gagged at the horrifying taste on my hands. My dog seems unaffected, and continues to chew the table legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13269) - you deserved it (2373)
On 09/04/2012 at 4:34pm - animals - by badwolf (man) - United States
Today, after months of believing my marriage has been better than ever, I found out that my husband has been cheating on me with our neighbor. I can't afford to move, and I have to see the fake-titted homewrecker every day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21408) - you deserved it (1390)
On 09/26/2012 at 1:07pm - love - by sucker (woman) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying on one of my little black dresses and heels. He wanted to "see what the fuss was about." I would have been angry if the sight of him dressed like this hadn't turned me on more than he ever has in the 3 years we've been dating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18028) - you deserved it (3660)
On 09/19/2012 at 11:09pm - intimacy - by ClaireBear150 (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13595) - you deserved it (32012)
On 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by WhyAppleWhy (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I injured myself in the geekiest way possible; I managed to crush my nipple while closing my laptop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14401) - you deserved it (5405) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 09/27/2012 at 12:10am - health - by Display - Sent from mobile version
Today, my girlfriend told me what turns her on: cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13027) - you deserved it (1543)
Today, while shopping, I saw a little girl and her mom. The girl was pouting so I tried to cheer her up by asking her if she was a princess, because she was so pretty. She smiled but her mom looked at me with disgust and told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20459) - you deserved it (1939)
On 09/10/2012 at 12:39am - kids - by well okay then (woman) - United States
Today, my mother shared my phone number with my brother, despite my explicit wishes that she didn't. He immediately went and put it on Craigslist and several other websites. This is the fourth time I've had to change my number for that very same reason. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19258) - you deserved it (1276)
On 09/10/2012 at 10:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
I agree, your life sucks (16816) - you deserved it (3189)
On 09/09/2012 at 4:34am - love - by JB (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, after having a long talk with my mother about gays, she told me that she was totally open. I felt completely relieved, being gay myself. Seconds later, she said, "But not for you. I want you to find me a nice girl that can give me lots of grand kids." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19843) - you deserved it (3188)
On 09/13/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by EvilMother (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I moved into my new apartment. I was feeling really excited until my new neighbor knocked on my door and left me what looks like rabbit ears on my welcome mat. He just stared at me expectantly as though I should be thankful. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13191) - you deserved it (1117)
On 09/17/2012 at 10:59am - misc - by Nickie809 - United States (Nevada)
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11142) - you deserved it (19313)
On 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by Fingkids - United States
Today, while at work, I helped my ex-husband pick out a ring for the girl he cheated on me with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24771) - you deserved it (4790)
On 09/21/2012 at 11:11am - love - by Sad ex-wife (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)
Monday 20 May 2013
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